Joe Nast: I'm sorry, I can't, I can't do this. It didn't happen. We loved each other, we broke it off. If I don't-Jesus, if I don't say this now, it'll never-she'll never be a part of this. What are we-what are we doing here? I don't even-I don't even know this guy. She-she didn't even know this guy. What's he got to do with her? I don't-look, you asked me to bring her in the room, and she's not here-she's not. And whatever happens here, whatever happens to this guy, she's not here. And the only way that you're gonna bring her in here is with the truth. I don't know-I don't know what else to say. You just tell me what to say, and I swear, I'll try, but if you want her, you got to keep it honest. You have to understand that Diana had this thing, this way of bringing out the real in people, not just the best, you know-their honesty. And I guess she's doing it again now cause there's no way I'd be sitting here saying these things I can't believe are coming out of my mouth. It was Diana who finally had the courage. *She* was the one who told *me* that I didn't want to go through with it. And I guess she's-she's doing it again, cause all of this-all of this is everything that she wouldn't want. She wasn't a bride-to-be. She wasn't a victim. She was strong and real and messed up and wickedly honest, just like her mother. And if I sit here trying to paint it any other way, I... Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just-I thought-I thought that if I could just... paint the pictures that you needed, you know, that... that somehow... that somehow you'd bring these people some peace, finally, and they'd have their daughter back, or... But, uh... that's not how she'd wanna be. The truth is hard. Sometimes it looks so wrong, you know-the color's off, the style's wrong, but I guess it-I guess it's where the good one's live.
Jo Jo Floss: When I go to bed at night I do 4 things. I drop my robe, slide under the sheets, turn on my left side and stick out my ass. That's it. That's the signal. I just - I back it right up there because I know when I do, no matter how cold the damn thing is, no matter how difficult it might feel, no matter how desperately we want to kill each other it's gonna be met by this warm body on the other side that's gonna hold it. Two arms that... wrap around, pull me out of my head, quiet the voices, save me from myself... without ever having to ask. Every night, 31 years. Every night there's my ass and every night... he never lets me down.
Jo Jo Floss: You find your home, and it may not be what you thought - you know; colour's off, style's wrong... but there it is anyway and to hell with you if you can't take a joke.
Jo Jo Floss: You find your home. Ben's mine.
Bertie: So, commercial real-estate?
Joe Nast: Commercial real-estate.
Bertie: What the hell does that mean?
Joe Nast: [laughing] I have no idea.
Bertie: And this is what you want to do?
Joe Nast: Not really.
Bertie: Oh, and what do you want to do?
Joe Nast: I want to figure out what I want to do.
Bertie: So you're kind of in "Escrow" at the moment?... real-estate term.
Joe Nast: Yeah, I recognized that one
June Mulcahey: [referring to Diana's death] He didn't tell me that you were
June Mulcahey: still tied up in all that?
Joe Nast: Really?
June Mulcahey: No.
Joe Nast: Well, you know, it was kind of a deal, the whole thing. The clean-up alone took days. You'd be amazed at what a mess a high-caliber weapon can make, an in a restaurant, all those little pieces of - all of - well anyway, let's just say it was pretty time-consuming. Then you got the whole burial to deal with. This whole coffin business - much more complicated than people think. Standard sizes? Dream on! Had to custom-fit the whole deal. Had a tailor come out, do her size right then and there. Do you know how hard it is to have a tailor come out to do house calls? And on a school night? I mean
Joe Nast: this is pulling teeth, you know what I'm saying? And then, you know, of course you got the house to deal with, and that's a whole other ordeal, you know? Cause who wants her stuff around, right? I mean, that's a valuable room, why waste it? So, you slog through that and, yeah, next thing you know a couple of weeks have gone by and your thinking to yourself "man oh man, am I still tied up with all this? Where did the time go?"
Joe Nast: [sneaking out through the bedroom window, whispers to himself] What are you, 16?
Mike Mulcahey: Joe, what kind of man do you take me for?... Prisoner of History?...
Joe Nast: [caught off guard] Not on appearance...?
Mike Mulcahey: Mired in - in convention or...
Joe Nast: Uh... I'm... guessing "no"?
Mike Mulcahey: Joe, we are brothers. I'm younger than you are. I'm a man of your time. What do we brother's lack...?
Joe Nast: So - uh, so many things...?
Mike Mulcahey: One thing!... one
Mike Mulcahey: time!
Bertie: You think if you just run around fast enough, figure out what everyone wants, no one's gonna notice what a coward you are? Are you that scared? - You sleep in that house, eat their food... you act like everyday's just another Sunday
Bertie: you think if you just keep it up, these people won't notice their daughter's missing?
Joe Nast: What are we doing that's so different? - Lend a hand, Bertie! There's not a body in that bar that thinks Cal McGinnis is ever coming home!
Joe Nast: You think I don't know that you're never gonna make room in your life for someone who want's to know you better than 60 lousy percent?
Joe Nast: It's the last 40 that counts!
Bertie: [whisper's] Where'd you go, Joe?
[walks out, slamming door behind her]
Joe Nast: [whisper's to himself] I'm... right here.
Joe Nast: She was strong and real and messed up and wickedly honest... just like her mother.
Joe Nast: The truth is hard. Sometimes it looks so wrong, y'know. The color's off, the style's wrong, but I guess... I guess it's where the good ones live.
Bertie: Sorry, we could not complete the postal cycle.
Jo Jo Floss: You never smoked did you, Joe?
Joe Nast: No.
Jo Jo Floss: Diana said you had sweet breath - the very first thing she told me... Atleast the girl had her priorities straight
Jo Jo Floss: Joe, what do you think your gonna do... without our girl?
Joe Nast: Jo-Jo, I have no idea.
Jo Jo Floss: Promise you'll let me know when you do.
Jo Jo Floss: of course, I'd like you to remain celibate for the rest of your life, but it's negotiable...
Jo Jo Floss: Now, I've been hearing so much shit lately, so much fluff, I've started to lose sight of her already, and... a phrase like "filled with goodness" actually passed through my mind today.
Joe Nast: I lost my friend.
Joe Nast: [voiceover] Dear Bertie, You asked me before where I went. And I want to tell you. I went to a place where nothing's right, where every moment's backwards, every sky's without colour, without hope. I tried to come back, Bertie. But I got lost. And while I was gone, I met you. And I didn't even have the courage to realize I was home. A wise friend of mine told me "we all have our homes", and now I know it's true. I hope you get this letter, Bertie. I figure I got 75 chances. Cause if you do you'll know that in the end, that's where I was. I found home, Bertie. I found you. I hope you can find your's soon. Get there - as fast as you can. And write me when you do. Love, Joe.
Jo Jo Floss: I love you, Joeseph.
Bertie: Oh shit, I gotta pee!
Joe Nast: [speaking to Bertie as she cries with her face turned away from him] Please let me see you. I want to see you.
[Bertie turns to Joe and they kiss]
June Mulcahey: Must keep you very busy. You must value your free time.
Joe Nast: Free time?
June Mulcahey: You know- going out, recreation.
Joe Nast: I - uh, not of late, no.
June Mulcahey: No?
Joe Nast: Yeah. Lately I've been a little, preoccupied.
June Mulcahey: [smiling] Oh, I see. Other interests.
Joe Nast: My fiance's death.
Jo Jo Floss: [at her type-writer] I'm doing an accounting, the real her, the Diana facts.
[reading from a piece of paper]
Jo Jo Floss: "Number 92- laughed like a pig. Full-throated, nasal snorts". Huh? I mean, this is the stuff! Fuck the perfume, give me the warts!
Jo Jo Floss: You.
Joe Nast: [chuckles] Ew. Those really ratty sandals she always loved to wear. They always made this incredible farting sound everytime she moved.