- Graham Norton: Roses are red, violets are blue / I can't write poems, but I've been told I've many other good qualities.
- Himself: Bringing the show to the U.S., they said I might want to get a bit of American in me. Huh, won't be the first time.
- Himself: They told me that I could do anything I wanted on the show, so, uh, hey, later on I'll be having sex with one of these three dirty German girls.