37 Ninja Kids (1982)

Its video cover, which has on it the fantastic gang from Lucky Seven along with the tag line - Your favourite 7 kids, plus 30 friends! - should be the first warning when you approach a film such as 37 Ninja Kids. Nothing else on the cover connects to that much superior movie, nor does anything representing a modern day setting!

There are no ninja kids - or ninjas as a matter of fact. I do believe the title 36 Kids From Shaolin Temple should have stuck with this release, which may have helped critics, fans and viewers be kinder...

While not the worst film in the world, its original English dub (on this copy) is highly annoying. It's bad guys look like they just stepped out of a pantomime, and the overall drive of the film is pretty boring. It features a number of orphaned kids who (we eventually find out) are hiding in Shaolin Temple to learn kung fu and steer clear of the evil Manchu's who want them dead.

They are taught by one monk - Heung Wan Pang (Hero From Shanghai; Dynamite Trio) which, in regards to one adult to 30 kids, would be hugely frowned upon in today's working environment. He treats them quite harshly, constantly putting them through rigorous training just in case one day they made need to fend for themselves - but he is also quite fatherly at the same time, showing some compassion and care to the younger ones.

A silent kitchen hand played by Sonny Yue (Shanghai 13; Raiders Of The Shaolin Temple) gives the kids a little extra training tips on the side before revealing that he too lost someone to the Manchu's many years ago! So all in all, the majority of the film focuses on training scenes, terrible attempts at comedy, and a ridiculous plot that all boils down to a grand finale in Bronze Girls Of Shaolin style - as in, its so crazy it has to be seen to be believed!

Monk Heung Wan Pang and Sonny Yue do deliver some half decent kung fu fight action against some regular known bad guys from that era who are helped by the one and only Paul Wei - the slimy little bad guy from Bruce Lee's Way Of The Dragon. The fights are handled by action director and prolific actor Su Chen Ping (Iron Neck Li; 18 Bronzemen; The One Armed Boxer) and when the adults get to move, they do so enough to entertain. The trouble is, for some, those fight scenes may just come a little too late...

The finale I mentioned of course features the big bad guy attacking the kids in a huge stone spinning top with blades and weapons sticking out! Thankfully, the kids had trained long enough in the art of the stone stool which is what they use to defeat him before Sonny Yue somehow manages to blow the thing to bits!

Overall: Probably just one for completists, 37 Ninja Kids isn't terrible, but its just not great...