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  • More properly titled 69 MINUTES (a title that's displayed on screen throughout, but evidently was objected to by Mike Wallace & co.), NUDES AT ELEVEN is an amateurish attempt at a TV spoof. I shudder to think how many hundreds (nay, thousands) of these imbecilic junkers have been ground out by pornographers, but hopefully the current "This Ain't XXX" trend will soon wear itself out.

    Tracey Adams is fitfully amusing as the anchor Connie Savage, hosting the porno news magazine of the air. Director Damon Christian is shameless in interrupting the video with commercials which in fact are merely trailers for other releases from the same video company AVC, so we sit through several minutes of scenes from Tom Byron singing (ugh!!) in CAT ALLEY and Nina Hartley & Keli Richards in BLAZING MATTRESSES. It's called padding, Damon.

    Production values are minimal in the main program. First vignette titled "Getting a Piece for Peace" limns the training of the French team in an annual cunnilingus contest held in Sweden. This lousy footage is dominated by the muscular physique of Francois Papillon, who oddly reminded me a lot of beefcake porn star Rick/Jim Cassidy in his heyday a decade earlier.

    Tish Ambrose is easy on the eye as sexologist Dr. Ruth, interviewed by Adams.

    A cold-war spoof starring Steve Drake as Agent Phelps (Mission: Impossible, anyone?) goes nowhere but fortunately permits Tracey to get down with some sex action. In general, the video wastes her talents, however.

    My least favorite (all-time) porn performer horns in as the leader of the Middle Eastern nation of Labia, and doesn't even bother to put on ANY sort of accent in making fun of Muammar Qadafi.

    Similarly, Jerry Butler's impression of Andy Rooney is unfunny, though he redeems himself by humping luscious Jeannie Pepper, clad in African animal skins in the video's only arousing performance.

    Scripters Cash Markman (he of the out-sized ego -see IMDb's listings) and Chad Randolph should refund whatever pittance they were paid for this lamest of "comedy" scripts.