This Year's Blond Y2K (1999)

Video   |  Adult

To break up a wedding, a jealous woman steals a garter belt with special meaning to the bride.

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5 April 2016 | lor_
Bobbi Bliss, the Actress!
A footnote for other fans, Bobbi Bliss is in my Adult pantheon as the most accomplished blow-job artist of all time. I've seen her in many, many gonzo scenes, but this forgotten potboiler has her in Starring billing for once, actually creating a character.

Unfortunately it's an off-day for the talented filmmaking team of Jerome Tanner and Raven Touchstone. The BTS short amusingly shows thick-accented Tanner directing the show, rather carelessly, and it's obvious this was conceived as assembly-line junk.

Title, which actually appears on screen as "2000" in place of the then-hip "Y2K" belongs to porn's treasure trove of meaningless monikers. Both leading ladies, Bliss and scene-stealing Chloe, are brunettes, with nominal sex roles for blondes. Plot is intentionally silly and impossible to predict before watching.

It concerns Lily's superstition, derived supposedly from her growing up in a family of showgirls dating back a couple of generations, that she can only have sex while wearing a frilly garter belt. Video should have had "Garter Belt" in the title, but that would be too logical.

Lily, played by Bobbi, belongs to a group of leather-wearing bikers, and is about to marry stolid Dutch (played by Jack Hammer, he of the multi-tattoos and poor dialog delivery). Fellow biker Chloe as Silver is jealous and wants Jack for herself, so she steals the garter belt/security blanket and even flaunts it in front of Dutch and Lily at their biker bar hangout. End of storyline.

So we have lots of humping, though Bobbi gets to emote from time to time, proving she's not 100% gonzo. Her vaunted deep-throat abilities are effortlessly displayed as she humps Hammer and also boy next door/shoulder to cry on Michael J. Cox, whose acting is the poorest in the show.

Chloe steals the picture with an uninhibited performance, highlighted by her sticking two oversize dildos in her pussy (I guess technically a double penetration, but far from what that term usually conjures up) during a three-way with bikers Evan Stone (strictly along for the ride in a gonzo assignment) and blonde Tara. In the BTS short, Chloe boasts of having two fists inside her at once for a recent Penthouse Magazine shoot, but we are only teased by an implied fisting scene (shown from distant camera angle only and not visible) with Kyle Stone in the BTS. It was likely dropped from the feature as inviting prosecution.

Video's release title and cover photo spotlight Tara, but that is strictly an afterthought, intended to mislead the buyer. (I had the same issue recently with an excellent feature from this time frame "April in January" in which star Ava Vincent as April was demoted in the packaging, upping small-role (playing her niece) Star E. Knight to box cover promotion.)

It's dumbed down entertainment not up to scripter Raven Touchstone's usual high standards, but a notable feature due to its terrific soundtrack (rhythm music perfectly matched to the sex visuals) credited to "HTR Productions". Current sex video directors should sample these older titles to see how well-chosen music can enhance the eroticism, something of a lost art nowadays.

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