John Billingsley: Dr. Phlox

Star Trek: Enterprise

Dr. Phlox

Dr. Phlox: Tell me, did your visit to the Xyrillian ship involve any... uh... romance?
Commander Tucker: What?
Dr. Phlox: Were you intimate with anyone?
Commander Tucker: Doc, I was over there to repair a warp reactor. What are you talking about?
Dr. Phlox: Seems you did a little more than repair work.
Commander Tucker: Meaning?
Dr. Phlox: This is a nipple.
Commander Tucker: I beg your pardon?
Dr. Phlox: Ah, ah, the blastocyst is located between the sixth and seventh intercostals.
Commander Tucker: What the hell are you talking about?
Dr. Phlox: I'm not quite sure congratulations are in order, Commander, but you're pregnant.

Commander Tucker: I'm getting punchy.
Dr. Phlox: Why aren't you getting together with T'Pol to get your neural nodes stimulated? Too intimate?
Commander Tucker: Nah, I don't have an hour a night to waste in T'Pol's quarters. Isn't there something else I could do.
Dr. Phlox: There is Alderberan mud leeches.
Commander Tucker: What the hell am I supposed to do with those?
Dr. Phlox: Place one on your chest and one on your abdomen an hour before going to bed. Their secretions act as a natural sedative. Oh, uh, please be careful to sleep on your back. If you roll over, you might anger them.
Commander Tucker: Maybe an hour a night with T'pol isn't so bad.

Ensign Hoshi Sato: I'm a translator. I didn't come out here to see corpses hanging on hooks.
Dr. Phlox: It goes without saying that you're going to encounter the unexpected.
Ensign Hoshi Sato: Not corpses on hooks.

[Dr. Phlox and Crewman Cutler are watching a movie in the ship's movie theatre]
Crewman Elizabeth Cutler: We can go if you're bored.
Dr. Phlox: No, no, I'd like to stay and see what happens.
[someone from the audience hisses for silence]
Crewman Elizabeth Cutler: You won't be disappointed. The ending's classic.
Dr. Phlox: No, not the film. I'm sensing a rising emotional undercurrent in the room. I'm curious to see if it culminates in some kind of group response.
Crewman Elizabeth Cutler: They don't have movies where you come from, do they?
Dr. Phlox: Well, we had something similar a few hundred years ago, but they lost their appeal when people discovered their real lives were more interesting.

[Lt. Reed has a bad case of the cold]
Lt. Reed: [sneezes] We can travel faster than the speed of light. You'd think we could find a cure for the common cold.
Dr. Phlox: You should be grateful. A human cold is so mild. I once had a patient with the Kamaraazite flu. He sneezed so violently, he nearly regurgitated his pineal gland.

Dr. Phlox: Lieutenant? Are you passing through or is there something I can help you with?
Lt. Reed: Actually, there is something.
Dr. Phlox: Yes?
Lt. Reed: I assume I can depend on doctor-patient confidentiality?
Dr. Phlox: This wouldn't have anything to do with gastrointestinal distress?
Lt. Reed: Is it that obvious?
Dr. Phlox: Not at all. There's a notation in your medical file. Something about, er, an unfortunate incident during zero-G training.
Lt. Reed: The EV simulator at Lunaport. Or, as Starfleet trainees call it: the Vomitorium.

[Dr. Phlox is infected by nanomachines and is slowly changing into a Borg]
Dr. Phlox: Why are you wearing a phase pistol?
Ensign Hoshi Sato: Oh, it's Lt. Reed's idea. If you come near me, I'm supposed to shoot you.
Dr. Phlox: I hope you'll use the stun setting.

[the crew is watching a detective movie from the '40s in the mess hall]
Dr. Phlox: Something tells me we haven't seen the last of the detective with the bow tie.
Commander Tucker: No, he died in a house fire.
Dr. Phlox: Ah, did he? The autopsy was inconclusive. I wouldn't be surprised if the body belonged to the delivery man. With the strange limp. You never did see him leave the house.
Commander Tucker: What about the gardener? He was there too.
Dr. Phlox: Too tall. Even the primitive forensics of the mid-20th century would have determined that.
Subcommander T'Pol: [annoyed by the distraction] Perhaps we should watch and find out.
Commander Tucker: Part of the fun of a mystery is trying to solve it before it ends, using logic. You of all people should appreciate that.
Subcommander T'Pol: Then use logic more quietly.

Dr. Phlox: When was the last time you slept?
Commander Tucker: T'Pol tattling on me?
Dr. Phlox: She's worried about you.
Commander Tucker: I appreciate that, but I'm holding this ship together with spit and bailing wire.
Dr. Phlox: Six hours.
Commander Tucker: Two.
Dr. Phlox: Four.
Commander Tucker: Done. And remind me never to buy a car from you.

Dr. Phlox: It's unethical to harm a patient. However, I can inflict as much pain as I like.

Dr. Phlox: If I'm not mistaken, they are preparing to mate. Do you think they might let me watch?

Subcommander T'Pol: [in the Mirror Universe] I noticed you've been making extensive use of the library database.
Dr. Phlox: I was merely researching classical literature. I wanted to compare our major works with their counterparts in the other universe. I skimmed a few of the more celebrated narratives. The stories were similar in some respects, but their characters were weak and compassionate. With the exception of Shakespeare, of course. What I can tell, his plays were equally grim in both universes.

Dr. Phlox: The will of the patient is the cornerstone of Denobulan medical ethics.
Captain Archer: Don't you believe if you can help someone, you're ethically bound to do so?
Dr. Phlox: Hippocrates wasn't Denobulan.

[Lt. Reed's stomach has been mutated]
Lt. Reed: Have you got anything for my stomach? Chef's food isn't sitting too well.
Dr. Phlox: Till your digestive tract is fully restored, you may want to avoid Mess Hall.
Lt. Reed: What do you suggest I eat?
Dr. Phlox: You're welcome to some of the moth larvae I feed to my Pyrithian bat.

Dr. Phlox: Commander Tucker reassigned the repair team that that was working here. He said the Armoury was a higher priority. We'll see how low a priority I am the next time he burns his fingers on a plasma conduit.