- Commander Tucker: You aren't saying much tonight. Don't tell me you're still upset about me and Amanda.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I'm not upset.
- Commander Tucker: Sure sounds like it.
- Subcommander T'Pol: You're mistaken.
- Commander Tucker: Why would a few neuropressure sessions between me and a MACO be such a big deal. Unless...
- Subcommander T'Pol: Unless what?
- Commander Tucker: Unless you're a little jealous.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I don't experience jealousy.
- Commander Tucker: You're doing a pretty fair imitation of it.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I am not, in any way, jealous of you and Corporal Cole.
- Commander Tucker: You know, your voice is tensing up. That's a dead giveaway.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I didn't know you were an expert in vocal inflections.
- Commander Tucker: I don't need to be an expert to read you. Come on, admit it. You're a little jealous.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Are you implying that I'm attracted to you?
- Commander Tucker: That kind of goes along with the assumption, doesn't it?
- Commander Tucker: I don't like pushing the engines at 110%
- Subcommander T'Pol: They are rated for 120
- Commander Tucker: My underwear's flame-retardant, but it doesn't mean I want to set fire to myself to prove it.
- Commander Tucker: [after being cursed at by a Klingon and not understanding him] Well I don't particularly like the way YOU smell, either.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I think you're mistaken about who's attracted to whom.
- Commander Tucker: Are you saying I'm attracted to you?
- Subcommander T'Pol: I don't need to say it, you already have.
- Commander Tucker: I don't remember that conversation.
- Subcommander T'Pol: It wasn't you, it was your clone, Sim told me.
- Commander Tucker: Sim?
- Subcommander T'Pol: He said he had feelings for me.
- Commander Tucker: He told you that?
- Subcommander T'Pol: [nodding towards the spot where Sim had stood] Standing right there.
- Commander Tucker: What the hell was he doing in your room?
- Subcommander T'Pol: Your voice is tensing up.
- Commander Tucker: Now you're the vocal expert?
- Subcommander T'Pol: I don't need to be an expert to read you.
- Commander Tucker: I can't believe this. I'm... I'm jealous of... myself?
- Subcommander T'Pol: You're jealous?
- Commander Tucker: No. Absolutely not. Okay, maybe, maybe I am a little.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Which would mean you're attracted to me.
- [Trip gives her a look]
- Subcommander T'Pol: It goes with the assumption.
- Commander Tucker: What just happened here? Did we? Are we?
- [T'Pol leans in and kisses Trip strongly]
- Subcommander T'Pol: I've run a check through the Starfleet database. You might be pleased to know that this is the first recorded incident of a human male becoming pregnant.
- Commander Tucker: Just how I always wanted to get into the history books.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: [the final lines in the show] Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its continuing mission...
- Captain James T. Kirk: ...to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations...
- Captain Archer: ...to boldly go where no man has gone before.
- [Upon waking up bound in a basement on Risa]
- Commander Tucker: You think this is my fault?
- Lt. Reed: You were willing to follow two strange aliens into a basement.
- Commander Tucker: Gorgeous aliens. Don't forget they were gorgeous.
- Lt. Reed: They were male.
- Commander Tucker: Not at first.
- [Mayweather has broken his leg on an alien planet and returned to the ship]
- Subcommander T'Pol: Why didn't you let them finish treating you on the surface?
- Travis Mayweather: Have you ever been to an alien hospital?
- Subcommander T'Pol: Yes, in San Francisco.
- Commander Tucker: I never got the impression you cared that much about humans. Seems like you were always finding something new to complain about.
- Vulcan Ambassador Soval: I lived on Earth for more than 30 years, Commander. In that time I developed an affinity for your world and its people.
- Commander Tucker: You did a pretty good job of hiding it.
- Vulcan Ambassador Soval: Thank You.
- [Porthos has run from the shuttlepod to some trees on an alien world]
- Commander Tucker: Going where no dog has gone before.
- Dr. Phlox: Tell me, did your visit to the Xyrillian ship involve any... uh... romance?
- Commander Tucker: What?
- Dr. Phlox: Were you intimate with anyone?
- Commander Tucker: Doc, I was over there to repair a warp reactor. What are you talking about?
- Dr. Phlox: Seems you did a little more than repair work.
- Commander Tucker: Meaning?
- Dr. Phlox: This is a nipple.
- Commander Tucker: I beg your pardon?
- Dr. Phlox: Ah, ah, the blastocyst is located between the sixth and seventh intercostals.
- Commander Tucker: What the hell are you talking about?
- Dr. Phlox: I'm not quite sure congratulations are in order, Commander, but you're pregnant.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Is there something else?
- Commander Tucker: You and Trip used to spend a lot of time here together.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I was instructing him in the practice of Vulcan neuropressure.
- Commander Tucker: I remember. We were lying right there
- [points to floor]
- Commander Tucker: working the neural nodes on each other's feet, talking about the warp engines. How I was hoping to modify them.
- Subcommander T'Pol: How Commander Tucker was hoping to modify them.
- Commander Tucker: [dejected] Right, Commander Tucker.
- [pause]
- Commander Tucker: You know, he was really starting to enjoy those sessions with you.
- Subcommander T'Pol: They were helping him sleep.
- Commander Tucker: [voice getting quieter] I'm not sure that's the only reason.
- Subcommander T'Pol: What do you mean?
- Commander Tucker: Was there ever anything between you and Trip?
- Subcommander T'Pol: If you are referring to a romantic relationship... no.
- Commander Tucker: The reason I ask is... well... you're all I think about, if you know what I mean. And, I'm not talking about an adolescent crush. That was... well, that was two days ago. This is much more serious, the way I feel about you. Anyway, what's driving me crazy is, I don't know if these feelings are mine... or his.
- Subcommander T'Pol: [voice cracking] I can't answer that.
- Commander Tucker: I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I'm not uncomfortable.
- Commander Tucker: I just thought I should tell you this, while I still had the chance.
- Subcommander T'Pol: May I come in?
- [Sim nods OK]
- Subcommander T'Pol: I just wanted to say how much your absence will affect the crew... how much it will affect me.
- Commander Tucker: I appreciate that. All in all, I guess I've a pretty good life...
- [T'Pol steps forward and gives him a short but sweet kiss]
- Commander Tucker: I couldn't have asked for a better going away present.
- [Archer is being interrogated violently by a Reptilian]
- Captain Archer: I'll bet you didn't know this, but at one time, most of my world was ruled by reptiles.
- Commander Dolum: I wasn't aware of that.
- Captain Archer: A comet hit around 65 million years ago caused a mass extinction. Most of the reptiles died out. Mammals became the dominant species.
- Commander Dolum: How unfortunate.
- Captain Archer: Still, the reptiles might have come out on top, if it hadn't been for a slight disadvantage.
- Commander Dolum: And what was that?
- Captain Archer: They had brains the size of a walnut. That's very small. Apparently, it's a constant in the universe.
- Commander Dolum: [resisting the urge to strangle Archer] Earth vessels... how many?
- Captain Archer: The reptiles didn't all die out. Some evolved into snakes, alligators, turtles. As a matter of fact, one of my favorite restaurants in San Francisco makes the most wonderful turtle soup. You should try it sometimes if you're ever in the area.
- Commander Dolum: [putting his hand to Archer's throat] You want me to kill you?
- Captain Archer: Just making conversation.
- Commander Tucker: I'm getting punchy.
- Dr. Phlox: Why aren't you getting together with T'Pol to get your neural nodes stimulated? Too intimate?
- Commander Tucker: Nah, I don't have an hour a night to waste in T'Pol's quarters. Isn't there something else I could do.
- Dr. Phlox: There is Alderberan mud leeches.
- Commander Tucker: What the hell am I supposed to do with those?
- Dr. Phlox: Place one on your chest and one on your abdomen an hour before going to bed. Their secretions act as a natural sedative. Oh, uh, please be careful to sleep on your back. If you roll over, you might anger them.
- Commander Tucker: Maybe an hour a night with T'pol isn't so bad.
- Lt. Reed: So what is happening between you and Amanda?
- Commander Tucker: We are just friends. Is everyone on this ship watching us?
- Lt. Reed: You're hard to miss.
- Commander Tucker: That's what T'Pol said.
- Lt. Reed: Is it true that she's giving Amanda neuropressure now? I heard it was damage control from your tender touch.
- Commander Tucker: T'Pol's just smoothing out some of the rough spots.
- [very clipped voice]
- Commander Tucker: That's all.
- Lt. Reed: Why were you giving Amanda Cole neuropressure anyway?
- Commander Tucker: [very defensive] What's it to you?
- Lt. Reed: Well, from what I've been told it's a pretty intimate procedure. Sure you're just friends?
- Commander Tucker: I do it with T'Pol. Are you implying that there is something going on there, as well?
- Lt. Reed: That's the rumor.
- Commander Tucker: For the last time, there is nothing going on with any of us. Between any of us.
- Lt. Reed: Right. Just friends?
- Commander Tucker: That's right.
- Lt. Reed: I guess this Vulcan neuropressure isn't that intimate after all.
- Commander Tucker: Exactly.
- Lt. Reed: In that case, I've got this nasty little pain...
- Commander Tucker: [voice very clipped] Just drop it.
- Commander Tucker: Have you talked to Lorian yet? He's a good kid, maybe you should get to know him.
- Subcommander T'Pol: No, I haven't and he is not a kid, he's over 100 years old.
- Commander Tucker: [laughs] Only in the expanse could I have a kid three times my age. Who would have thought, you and me, huh? Lorian says we're going to be married in a traditional Vulcan ceremony. It's gonna take me weeks to learn to pronounce the vows. You know where we are going to have our honeymoon? Cargo Bay Three! He says, "I'll fill it up with sand that we dug up from a passing asteroid". I'm even supposed to,
- [laughs]
- Commander Tucker: manufacture a palm tree.
- Subcommander T'Pol: It's ridiculous to assume that those events are going to happen. Hand me the flux coupler.
- Commander Tucker: Aren't you at all curious about how you and I are supposed to end up together?
- Subcommander T'Pol: The fact that our counterparts marry doesn't mean we'll do the same.
- Commander Tucker: You're afraid to admit that under the right circumstances, you could have feelings for me. Maybe you have them already.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I should've known this was a mistake.
- Commander Tucker: What?
- Subcommander T'Pol: Exploring human sexuality with you. You're obviously unable to have a physical relaionship without developing an emotional attachment.
- Commander Tucker: You know, all the other women on board must have been taken, because I can't imagine any other reason why I would've married someone as stubborn as you.
- Commander Tucker: Computer, begin recording. Dear Mr. and Mrs. Taylor, by the time you get this, Starfleet will have already told you about Jane. Since I worked so closely with her, I wanted to add my personal condolences. I have to admit, I've been putting off writing this for a while. I convinced myself that my duties on Enterprise took precedence. But the truth is I didn't want to face the fact that someone so young with so much promise could just be gone. But I'm facing it now. And I find myself thinking how important she was to me. She was a great engineer. And she was my friend. She won't be forgotten.
- Commander Tucker: We should have heard something by now. What if they failed? Earth could be...
- [T'pol puts a hand on his shoulder to calm him]
- Subcommander T'Pol: Be patient.
- Commander Tucker: [looks at her hand] My skin's healing faster than yours. I guess you Vulcans aren't so tough after all.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Dr. Phlox says we should all be back to normal within two to three days.
- Commander Tucker: I'm only kidding. You look nice like this, kind of like an old oil painting.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I am not old. I will only be 66 years old on my next birthday.
- Commander Tucker: I can't believe you told me that.
- Subcommander T'Pol: You accused me of looking old!
- Commander Tucker: That's not what I mean. I've been trying to get you to tell me your age since we left space dock. Why now?
- Subcommander T'Pol: To Vulcans, certain information is considered... intimate.
- Commander Tucker: Intimate? Hmm.
- Zefram Cochrane: On this site, a powerful engine will be built... an engine that will someday let us travel a hundred times faster than we can today. Imagine it. Thousands of inhabited planets at our fingertips. And we'll be able to explore those strange new worlds... and seek out new life and new civilizations. This engine will let us go boldly... where no man has gone before.
- [observing an unconscious Klingon pilot]
- Admiral Leonard: He's a Kling-ot.
- Tos: A Kling-on.
- Captain Archer: Where'd he come from?
- Commander Williams: Oklahoma.
- [after finding a ship from the future with a corpse in it that has both human and Vulcan genes, T'Pol has to make a report for the Vulcan High Command]
- Captain Archer: I wonder... if they'll believe that humans and Vulcans will be... swapping chromosomes one day.
- Subcommander T'Pol: They're more likely to believe in time travel.
- Commander Tucker: Where did you put the phase pistols?
- Lt. Reed: You're going to shoot a bug?
- Commander Tucker: I'm just going to stun it.
- Subcommander T'Pol: What do you suggest I do?
- Subcommander T'Pol: [old T'Pol] There's a human expression. "Follow your heart."
- Subcommander T'Pol: What if my heart doesn't know what it wants?
- Subcommander T'Pol: [old T'Pol] It will, in time, It will.
- Subcommander T'Pol: You've dismissed all my proposals.
- Commander Tucker: When you come up with one which doesn't involve blowing ourselves up, I'll be a little more enthusiastic.
- Subcommander T'Pol: You might surprise me with an idea of your own.
- Commander Tucker: Maybe you haven't had time to meditate. I don't know. But whatever's going on with you lately, I've had enough. I'll work on this in Engineering. Call me if you have any more brilliant ideas.
- [he turns to leave]
- Subcommander T'Pol: Commander... Trip!
- [he stops and comes back]
- Subcommander T'Pol: Everything that's happened recently has caused me to become slightly emotional.
- Commander Tucker: I've noticed.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I apologize.
- Commander Tucker: Forget about it.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I wish I could. It may take some time for me to regain my control. It will be difficult for me to deal with, especially... on my own.
- Commander Tucker: This hasn't been easy for any of us. You know how much I appreciate what you did for me. When this is over, I'm all ears. Why don't we take another crack at this?
- T'Les: How long have you been romantically involved with my daughter?
- [off, Trip surprised face]
- T'Les: How long have you been attracted to her?
- Commander Tucker: Since our first argument, I felt the chemistry between us. But, I had a feeling T'Pol wasn't going to mention it.
- T'Les: She didn't. I'm her mother.
- [to T'Pol]
- Captain Archer: You have no idea how much I'm restraining myself from knocking you on your ass.
- Commander Tucker: I've heard the women on Draylax have...
- Travis Mayweather: Three... it's true.
- Commander Tucker: You know that first-hand?
- Travis Mayweather: First-hand, second-hand, third-hand...
- Subcommander T'Pol: [about her marriage to Koss] Trip, I have to do this... for many reasons.
- Commander Tucker: And how am I supposed to take this?
- Subcommander T'Pol: I'm sorry.
- Commander Tucker: You're sorry. You brought me 16 light years just to watch you get married to someone you barely know.
- Commander Tucker: You did all that... with a phase pistol?
- Lt. Reed: You're good at building things. I'm good at blowing them up.
- Captain Archer: [Archer and T'Pol are being stalked by a large, ravenous Vulcan sehlat] How long before it starts to lose interest in us?
- Subcommander T'Pol: Days, at least. They're very persistent creatures. When I was a child I had one as a pet.
- Captain Archer: You had one of those?
- Subcommander T'Pol: Domesticated. They're smaller... slightly.
- Captain Archer: How slightly?
- Subcommander T'Pol: You have Porthos.
- [referring to Captain Archer's pet beagle]
- Captain Archer: Porthos doesn't try and eat me when I'm late with his dinner.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Vulcan children are *never* late with their sehlat's dinner.
- Captain Archer: I can believe that.
- Subcommander T'Pol: The Earth cargo ship Fortunate. Y-class freighter. Maximum speed: warp one point eight. Crew complement: twenty-three.
- Travis Mayweather: Not counting newborn babies.
- Captain Archer: Ensign?
- Travis Mayweather: I grew up on a J-class, a little smaller but the same basic design. And one thing I can tell you is that at warp one point eight, you've got a lot of time on your hands between ports. That's how my parents wound up with me.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Do you have any helpful information on this vessel beyond its recreational activities?
- [Malcolm mentions he is going to reread Ulysses]
- Commander Tucker: I'd rather realign every microcircuit on this shuttle than try to read through that baby.
- Lt. Reed: British schools have a core curriculum. It serves to provide a well-rounded education. Sometimes I think you North Americans read nothing but comic books and those ridiculous science fiction novels.
- Commander Tucker: I'll have you know that Superman was laced with metaphor. Subtext layered on subtext.
- [Archer, T'Pol and Ambassador Soval are hiding from hostile Andorians]
- Captain Archer: No offense, but my ears are less likely to draw fire then yours.
- Vulcan Ambassador Soval: [to T'Pol] What is their fixation with our ears?
- Subcommander T'Pol: I believe they are envious.
- Lt. Reed: All we have left is to reset the emitters.
- Lieutenant Talas: What's the frequency?
- Lt. Reed: I'll do it.
- Lieutenant Talas: You don't trust me.
- Lt. Reed: No offence, but when it comes to our weapons frequencies, I wouldn't trust my own mother.
- Lieutenant Talas: Is your mother considered a security risk?
- Lt. Reed: It's just an expression.
- Lieutenant Talas: An odd one. My mother's security clearance is higher than mine.
- Lt. Reed: What do you think of T'Pol, hmm? Do you think she's pretty?
- Commander Tucker: T'Pol? Are you serious?
- Lt. Reed: Well, she is a woman you know. I think she's pretty.
- Commander Tucker: You've had too much to drink.
- Lt. Reed: Don't tell me you've never noticed her, you know, in that way.
- Commander Tucker: Nah, she's a Vulcan.
- Lt. Reed: I think she's pretty.
- Commander Tucker: Oh, God.
- Lt. Reed: You ever noticed her bum?
- Commander Tucker: What?
- Lt. Reed: Her bum. She's got an awfully nice bum.
- Commander Tucker: [toasts] To Subcommander T'Pol.
- Lt. Reed: Awfully nice.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Commander, are you feeling alright?
- Commander Tucker: People are gossiping T'Pol. Malcolm thinks we are doing more than neural pressure.
- Subcommander T'Pol: We are both senior officers. If we were pursuing a romantic relationship, it wouldn't be Lieutenant Reed's concern, would it?
- Commander Tucker: I suppose not.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Shall we continue?
- Subcommander T'Pol: [explaining in Vulcan why Trip is with her] Commander Tucker is my colleague, he wanted to visit Vulcan.
- T'Les: [in Vulcan] This is the first time you've brought a colleague home with you.
- T'Les: [on why T'Pol doesn't want to marry Koss] It's because of Commander Tucker, isn't it? He's the reason why you refuse to bond with Koss. Do you really believe that a human and a Vulcan can have a future together? Imagine the shame your children would endure, assuming the two you could have children.
- Subcommander T'Pol: [angrily] That wouldn't be your concern.
- [T'Pol answers one of the Captain's suggestions]
- Subcommander T'Pol: Captain, this may surprise you, but I agree.
- Subcommander T'Pol: How are your parents?
- Commander Tucker: They're... fine. They moved into a new house in Mississippi. It's not like the old place in Panama City, but it's pretty nice. Why do you ask?
- Subcommander T'Pol: You haven't spoken of them recently.
- Commander Tucker: There hasn't been a lot of time to catch up.
- Subcommander T'Pol: You also haven't joined us at the Captain's table since we left earth.
- Commander Tucker: What are you trying to say?
- Subcommander T'Pol: You've been avoiding me.
- Commander Tucker: Well, maybe I have. You've got to admit it's a little awkward. You're married. I know you did it to help your mother, but it's going to take me a little while to adjust.
- Subcommander T'Pol: I'm still adjusting to it myself.
- Commander Tucker: This is going to sound strange, but as tough as it was watching you go through the ceremony, I was proud of you for what you did. I guess it's for the best.
- Subcommander T'Pol: What do you mean?
- Commander Tucker: Come on. It's not like we would have made the ideal couple... a Vulcan and a human? Romeo and Juliet probably stood a better chance.
- Commander Tucker: Well this isn't what I expected.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Meaning?
- Commander Tucker: Well it's beautiful.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Vulcans appreciate beauty.
- Commander Tucker: [Walks around her] Well you always were a snazzy dresser.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Commander Tucker, I suggest...
- [T'Pol's mother T'Les walks up behind them]
- Subcommander T'Pol: Mother I didn't expect you home so early.
- T'Les: Have you informed T'Pol?
- Commander Tucker: Informed her of what?
- T'Les: You're in love with her.
- Commander Tucker: [seeing T'Pol in her brial gown] You look amazing.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Thank you for coming.
- Commander Tucker: Wouldn't have missed it for the world.
- [He goes to leave, she stops him for a second to give him a kiss on the cheek and walks away]
- Commander Tucker: You're supposed to be resting.
- Subcommander T'Pol: Dr. Phlox says I can resume my duties this afternoon.
- Commander Tucker: I'm glad they got that thing off with no problem.
- Subcommander T'Pol: There's a slight ringing in my left ear, but it should dissipate over time.
- Commander Tucker: Well, I'll let you get back to that.
- [He turns to leave]
- Subcommander T'Pol: Vulcans don't have honeymoons.
- [He comes back]
- Subcommander T'Pol: After the ceremony I went to Mt. Seleya to meditate
- [clears throat]
- Subcommander T'Pol: ... alone.
- Commander Tucker: It's none of my business anyway.
- Dr. Arik Soong: [to T'Pol] Sorry about that business with the Orions, I hope you wern't permanently injured.
- Commander Tucker: Why don't you stay focused on what you are doing.
- Dr. Arik Soong: Ooh! Someone's a little protective of Commander T'Pol.
- Commander Tucker: I just don't like you very much.
- Captain Archer: You missed T'Pol's latest battle with chopsticks.
- Commander Tucker: Darn. Dinner and a show.