American Pie 2 (2001)

Chris Klein: Oz

Photos 

Quotes 

• Stifler : You're a disgrace to men everywhere. I mean, look at the Stifmeister. I got laid 23 times this year, and I'm not counting the hummer I got in the library stacks, baby.

  Oz : Here's a new idea for you Stifler. You find a girl, you two become best friends and you don't bother counting how many times you have sex with each other you just laugh at the people who do count.

  Stifler : Here's a new idea for you. I'll get you a spoon so you can eat my ass.

• Heather : [On the phone to Oz]  Oz what should I do now?

  Stifler : [Also on the phone pretending to be Oz]  Oh Heather baby. Why don't you tell me my dick is as big as Stifler's.

  Oz : Stifler get off.

  Stifler : I am getting off listening to the two of you. Keep going.

• Stifler : [after Finch got into Stifler's mom's car and driving off]  Hey, where's shit-break?

  Jim : Uh, at the movies.

  Kevin : Took the bus.

  Oz : Coffee.

  Stifler : Wait a second... Who the fuck was in that car?

• Stifler : Who the hell was that?

  Oz : That was uh... that was...

  Jim : Was someone was lost looking for the lake.

  Kevin : Yeah.

  Oz : Yeah, turned around.

  Stifler : What a dumbass, the lake's right there.

• Heather : [Interrupted during phone call]  Hey, Marco, could you get your balls off me?

  [talking about soccer balls] 

  Oz : Hey, what the heck's goin' on over there?

  Heather : Oh, those are just my flat-mates.

• Jim : Nadia will be expecting filet mignon, okay, and all I'm going to be able to give her is rump roast.

  Oz : What are you so worried about? You've had experience since Nadia.

  Jim : Ah, yes. You would be referring to the flute fetish band geek, who made me her bitch, and ditched me after prom.

• Jim : You got laid in an art museum?

  Finch : The Met. Oh, and the Guggenheim with Francesca.

  Jim : The Guggenheim?

  Finch : And then my Social Psyche professor in Baskin-Robbins.

  Jim : Alright, enough Finch.

  Finch : But, I'll tell you none of these women even compares to...

  Jim , Oz , Kevin : Stifler's mom!

  Finch : Stifler's mom is a goddess.

• Stifler : Hey, where's shitbrick?

  Kevin , Jim , Oz : Movies, took the bus, coffee.

  Stifler : Wait a second.

  Stifler : Who the fuck was in that car?

• Stifler : Shake off your chains of monogamy, my man!

  Oz : I don't think so. You know I'll never turn to the dark side.