- Cordelia: All this fuss over a stupid book? Why don't you people get your priorities straight? Hel-lo! Cheerleading competition this week!
- Cordelia: What are you doing just standing here? You need to save our tight end! We need him for the game, and for my morale! On the other hand, that skank slut hitting on him at the Bronze, strictly optional.
- Xander: If I ever get my hands on Spike, I'll make him wish he'd never been born... reborn... unborn! You get the picture!
- The Master: What? No witty banter? Pity, I had built up so much nostalgia for our reunion.
- Buffy: I need to hit that with something, and stunning how often I get to say that.
- Vampire: Never thought of yourself as a walking juice box, did'ya?
- Vampire: You can't win, Slayer; There's only one of you... but there's an endless supply of us.
- Spike: With all that shapeshifting, sometimes the heart's in a different place. And sometimes you just need a bigger shaft.