A Pinch of Snuff (1994– )

Gareth Hale: Andy Dalziel

Quotes 

• Insp. Andy Dalziel : Are you a naturalised citizen?

  Maurice Arany : Yes.

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : I bet you'd like to go back to Hungary after all these years, eh. Take a little look.

  Maurice Arany : You cannot deport me.

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : [grinning]  I wouldn't dream of it. Not while I can violate your human rights over here.

• [Dalziel tells Pascoe how Haggard used to get the boys in his school to beat him with a cane; Pascoe looks po-faced] 

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : What's up, Inspector? Miscalculated a fart?

• [discussing an interview with a suspect] 

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : So, Godfrey Blengdale's a member of the Cally Club. And him a clean-rectummed Alderman and Justice of the Peace with a class-act "county" wife. Well, well, well!

  Det Sgt Edgar Wield : According to Mr Arany's statement...

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : It took him long enough to deliver. You didn't bounce him off t'wall hard enough, did you?

  Det Sgt Edgar Wield : [pompously]  We observed the correct procedures, Sir - at all times.

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : No wonder he messed you about. There's a moral there, Sergeant.

  Det Sgt Edgar Wield : Anyroad, according to Arany he left Mr Blengdale with Dr Haggard at about 11:15 on the night of the murder.

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : Then some stupid sod best have a word with Godfrey "Call Me God" Blengdale... hadn't he?

  Det Sgt Edgar Wield : Meaning me, Sir?

  Insp. Andy Dalziel : No, Sergeant, modestly I was alluding to myself.