- Phonce: There's two kinds of people in the world: those whose arse holes seize up during a crisis and those who shit themselves. Winston Churchill, during the blitz for instance - his sphincter locked with bulldog determination. They say he never shit during the entire Battle of Britain.
- Phonce: There's a phone booth down by the baseball diamond. Now nobody will see you there and it's nice and quiet.
- Dave: Why can't we make the phone call from here?
- Phonce: Because, sir, we've got to cover our backs. Alright, Dave? They've probably got some sort of a call-tracing mechanism down at the CBC just in case some lunatic calls in and says he's planning on skullfucking the premier.