Shark Tale (2004)

Jack Black: Lenny

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Lenny accidentally eats Oscar] 

  Oscar : Don't... swallow!

  Lenny : Oscar?

  Oscar : No, it's Pinocchio - of course it's me! Why did you do that?

  Lenny : Oh, I'm sorry...

  Oscar : No, "sorry" is when you step on somebody's fin at the theatre! Yeah, that's "sorry"! "Sorry" is when you ask somebody "Hey, when's the baby due?" and it turns out the person's just fat! No, this is as far away from "sorry" as you can possibly get!

  Lenny : Oscar, I think I'm gonna puke...

  Oscar : Oh, no no no no... Lenny, just open up, nice and slow!

• [Angie becomes unbelievably and understandably jealous after seeing Oscar and Lola kiss on television] 

  Angie : Just tell me, Oscar, 'cause I'm curious - why do you think she's interested, huh? Do you think, for one minute, that she would even be WITH you if you weren't the rich and famous Shark Slayer?

  Lenny : [trying to intervene]  Awww, you guys, please don't fight...

  Angie : Are you that blind?

  Oscar : At least she treats me like I'm somebody!

  Angie : Yeah, well would she love you if you were nobody?

  Oscar : NOBODY loved me when I was nobody!

  Angie : I DID!

• [Frankie starts humming the Jaws tune] 

  Lenny : That song gives me the creeps!

  Frankie : What do ya mean? It's our theme song!

  [the Jaws tune starts to play, and the opening credits roll] 

• Frankie : Sorry, pop. Lenny had a little accident. He was born!

  Lenny : Ha ha. You're a comedy genius.

• Lenny : [quietly]  Echo. Echo.

  [little louder] 

  Lenny : Now batting in for the Southside Sharks, Number 15...

  [Oscar hits Lenny] 

  Lenny : Ow, it's not okay to hit.

• Oscar : Well, for your information, I am the Sharkslayer. That's what they're callin' me.

  Lenny : Wait a minute. You mean when the...

  Oscar : Uh-huh.

  Lenny : And then you...

  [gasps] 

  Lenny : Oh, you're a liar!

• Lenny : SHHH! He could still be out there!

  Oscar : Who?

  Lenny : The Shark Slayer...

  [Oscar laughs] 

  Oscar : There's no Shark Slayer.

  Lenny : Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha, yes there is!

  Oscar : Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha, no there is NOT! Trust me on this one!

  Oscar : Get a grip, man! This is no time to act crazy!

  Oscar : You're the one acting crazy, crazy!

• Frankie : [dying]  Lenny, is that you?

  Lenny : I'm here, Frankie.

  Frankie : Come closer.

  Lenny : Yes, what is it?

  Frankie : I feel so cold.

  Lenny : That's just because we're cold-blooded.

  [Frankie slaps Lenny] 

  Lenny : Ow!

  Frankie : Moron.

  [dies] 

  Lenny : Frankie, no. NOOOOOOOO!

  [starts crying] 

  Lenny : This is all my fault. I'm so sorry, Frankie. How am I ever gonna explain this to Pop.

  [swims away, crying] 

  Lenny : Oh, no.

• Oscar : [clears throat]  It was an anchor that killed Frankie. I didn't have anything to do with it and neither did Lenny.

  Don Lino : Well then if... that was true, then why did you run away?

  Lenny : Because you always wanted me to be like Frankie. I'll never be the shark you want me to be.

  Oscar : What is your problem? So your son likes kelp. So his best friend's a fish. So he likes to dress like a dolphin, so what? Everybody loves him just the way he is. Why can't you?

• Oscar : You dig, dawg?

  Lenny : Dig dawg... , dawg dig, dig dawg, yeah, yo diggy dog!

• Don Lino : [hugging his son]  Lenny? Is that you? You're alive? I thought I'd lost you... What're you wearing, huh? What is that?

  [Lenny heaves a resigned sigh and sheds his disguise. The other sharks gape at him] 

  Luca : Hey, boss, it's Lenny - he was wearing a disguise so we wouldn't recognise him, but he's not wearing a disguise, so we DO recognise him!

  Lenny : Hi, Pop...

  Don Lino : Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Are you out of your MIND? Do you have any idea how this looks?

  Giuseppe : This is the best sit-down I've ever been to!

  Don Lino : What're you doing with this guy? He took out your own flesh and blood, Frankie!

  Lenny : But Pop, just listen...

  Don Lino : But nothing, you never take sides against the family, ever!

  Oscar : Don, Lino, sir, listen, it's not his fault - this is between you and me!

  Don Lino : What did I ever do to YOU? You took Frankie away, and you turned Lenny into a dolphin! I'm going to get you!

  [He goes for Oscar] 

• [staging a mock fight] 

  Oscar : Listen to them, Lenny! They love us!

  Lenny : They love YOU, they hate me!

• Oscar : All right, I totally betrayed you, but before we work this out I got a small thing to take care of...

  Angie : Oh, yeah? What's that?

  Oscar : SHARKS... ARE COMING... TO GET ME!

  Angie : And they should! What did you expect? You just take credit for killing a shark and then everything would be fine and dandy for the rest of your life?

  Oscar : Uh... yeah. But don't worry. Me and Lenny, we're gonna take care of this...

  Lenny : Whoa, whoa, whoa! What's with the "we"? I don't want any part of this?

  Oscar : Hey, too late now, Veggie Boy, they'll be looking for you too!

  Lenny : Point taken. What's the plan?

• Lenny : Here I come! Ta-da! I'm Sebastian! The whale washing dolphin!

  [makes clicking noises] 

• [Oscar "kills" Lenny] 

  Lenny : Aaahhh! Curse you, Shark Slayer!

  [falls into an abyss] 

• [first lines] 

  [a shark slowly approaches a worm, who frantically struggles to get free of his line...] 

  Lenny : Hi, I'm Lenny.

  [the worm faints] 

  Lenny : Ooh! Little buddy, did I scare you?

• Lenny : Mom says it's not okay to hit!

  [Frankie slaps Lenny] 

  Frankie : Mom's not here!

• Angie : You're going way too far, Oscar!

  Lenny : Actually, he hasn't gone far enough...

  Oscar : Exactly!... what?

• Lenny : It's all my fault, kinda, not really, but still...