She Spies (2002–2004)
Natashia Williams: Shane Phillips
Photos
Quotes
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Shane Phillips : We've got 'She Spy' action figures.
D.D. Cummings : We have 'She Spy' action figures?
Shane Phillips : Yeah. You wind them up and they dare you to find their time slot.
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Cassie McBain : There are things I'd rather be doing than dying.
Shane Phillips : Playing miniature golf.
Cassie McBain : Wallpapering the guest bedroom.
Shane Phillips : Watching the second season of 'The Bachelor.'
[pause]
Shane Phillips : Nah.
Cassie McBain : Rather be dying.
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[to a suspect]
Shane Phillips : You've got a record longer than In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida.
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Shane Phillips : It's sleaze like that that gives sleaze like us a bad name.
Jack Wilde : Yeah, well, contact your union.
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Amy : Who the hell are you people?
Shane Phillips : We're ex-cons working for a clandestine group to take down low-lifes likes you.
Mica Divornak : That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
Cassie McBain : Yeah, everyone always says that.
Shane Phillips : Right before we kick their asses.
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Shane Phillips : Why don't you leave the whole 'I'm too good for the whole world' look to the professionals?
Andrea : And maybe you should leave that sassy but Sassoon look to the late night action adventure shows?
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Shane Phillips : That reminds me of what I miss most about prison
D.D. Cummings : Shaving your legs?
Shane Phillips : Okay, second most.
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D.D. Cummings : What's a plethora?
Shane Phillips : "Flora" with a lisp.
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Cassie McBain : Sorry, it's just not one of those stories you enjoy retelling...
[cut to flashback]
Cassie McBain : but I'll try.
Shane Phillips : What's going on?
Cassie McBain : It's a flashback. If we were on TV, there'd be those fuzzy little edges all around the picture.
D.D. Cummings : Wow...
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[watching a tape of Indigo]
D.D. Cummings : Why is he telling us exactly what he's going to do?
Shane Phillips : That's cocky.
Indigo : I'll tell you why and yes, it is cocky. I'm so good at outguessing you authority types I knew what your last two statements were.
Jack Wilde : He is good.
Indigo : [still on tape] Aren't I just?
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Shane Phillips : This is torture!
Nicky : Torture, nah, recovering for a month in a hospital bed after a job, losing the remote, and having to sit through a TVLand marathon of "The Wayan Brothers" - now that's torture.
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Cassie McBain : And how many double agents can you have before everybody is just a double-agent, and nobody's just an agent-agent anymore?
Shane Phillips : (thinks about it) Six.
Cassie McBain : Really? I didn't know that.
Shane Phillips : I'm pretty sure it's in the handbook.
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Shane Phillips : You don't even care if I understand your jokes, right?
D.D. Cummings : I care - but it's not critical.
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Cassie McBain : Would've been better with ninjas.
Shane Phillips : That's what we were saying.
D.D. Cummings : You think so too?
Cassie McBain : Absolutely, the noises they make and the way they always travel in groups. And how about how they let one finish fighting before the other jumps in
Shane Phillips : Yeah, we forgot about that. They are so polite.
D.D. Cummings : I like that about ninjas.
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Cassie McBain : What a day, huh? Parachuting into a cemetary because the perimeter was guarded and it was our only way in, and exposing a deadly double agent who was trying to elude capture by faking his own death and being buried with an oxygen tank, only to be dug up later.
D.D. Cummings : We knew all that, you know.
Cassie McBain : I know. I'm just saying it for anyone who might've been wondering why we're going through all that trouble.
Shane Phillips : Who'd be wondering?
Cassie McBain : I don't know, anyone.
[pauses and looks around]
Cassie McBain : Look, I've never told you guys this, it's kind of embarrassing. Sometimes I get the weirdest feeling like people are watching us, like they're listening in on every single thing we do or say.
Shane Phillips : Yeah, I get that feeling, too.
D.D. Cummings : So do I.
[all 3 turn to look suspiciously into the camera]
Cassie McBain : Creepy, huh?
D.D. Cummings : Yeah, very.
Shane Phillips : My hair's a mess.
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Cassie McBain : Careful is my middle name.
[to Shane]
Cassie McBain : Changed it from Lillian.
Shane Phillips : Good thinking.
