23 June 2002 | ETCmodel02
Don't let the cast list fool you, this is deep hurting.
Andy Lau, Hsu Qi, Rosomund Kwan, what could go wrong? Let's start with a shallow story, awkward pacing, loads of unmotivated 360 degree jump cuts, inconsistent character super powers, recycled explosion footage, unresolved two dimensional character issues, inconsistencies in alien monsters, and perhaps some of the worst secondary character acting I've seen since Hercules Goes Bananas. The white cast is dubbed over in English, the establishing shot of San Francisco is actually the Hong Kong harbor, and explain to me why aliens that can fly away into space as clouds of CGI vapor would ever need space ships to begin with. On the flip side, though, this film has some elements that made it fun to watch in a very Mystery Science Theater 3000 kind of way. The translation of "ow!" to subtitles that read "terrible pain" was a funny moment in context, and dialogue like "Not only the Chinese know Chinese Kung Fu!" from the head of the secret U.S. alien defense team Double X had me on the floor. And don't forget the line "We've traced his brainwaves!" Oh boy. The loads of CGI monsters and tentacles were fun, and the kid playing the young version of Andy Lau deserves and Eyebrow Acting Oscar. Fans of deep hurting schlock will dig this, everyone else go back and rent Full-time Killer or Love on a Diet or Love Me, Love My Money. Heck, anything else would probably be more healthy for your mind than this, well, maybe not Bio-Dome.