Valentina's Tango (2006) User Reviews (2)

Very disappointing...

[Baramov · 3/10 · 23 July 2008]

To be honest, I approached this movie with a lot of skepticism. Those of you who are familiar with Lobato's work will probably understand why. Still, I believe that I gave "Valentina's Tango" a fair chance. Undeserved.

The script is too linear and the Greek tragedy concept is poorly mixed into the mafia story line. The "twist", if we can even call it that, is way too predictable and rather uninteresting. Granted, it's a tough combination, but why start something if you don't have what it takes to do it right? Very poor job.

The acting is pathetic. I honestly couldn't single out neither a lead nor a supporting actor/res to praise. Admittedly the dialog itself is very weak, but that's no excuse for an awful and disoriented performance.

And if after reading the above paragraphs you are wondering why I gave "Valentina's Tango" a 3 and not a 1, the answer is simple - the dancing. Even if everything else in this movie sucked, you are still left with a warm feeling. There's so much passion in the tango scenes, so much grace... That's probably the only thing that actually worked for me in the last 100 minutes.

My final advice is - if you are not really crazy about dancing - do NOT waste your time.

-- Blady

MISUNDERSTOOD DARK COMEDY

[nogodnomasters · 10/10 · 24 June 2019]

This movie is categorized as a drama, but I found myself laughing at many scenes which were supposed to be tragic. The movie starts out with a couple of teen kids in Argentina who get caught making love. The woman, Valentina, is a nymphomaniac. She describes her first lover, Hugo, her bath time ducky with the paint worn off the bill. We later find out she has a passion for the Tango. I mean a real passion as it brings her to orgasm.

Flash forward about 20 years and Valentina and her husband Eduardo own a Tango club in LA and they have two adult male sons, Eddie and Victor. Eddie wants to be a priest and Victor wants to be a crime boss. Eduardo and Valentina dance on stage as Valentina has quiet orgasms in front of the audience. Victor's crime boss wants to buy the Tango club, but Eduardo does not want to sell. Victor acts as the go-between. Victor has two girlfriends. One is a potty mouth named Vicky. She is a passionate Latino version of Mila Kunis. At one point she curses Valentina thinking she was Victor's girlfriend and not his mom. Tina goes out with Victor because she is in love with Eddie. (Go figure.) Once the shooting happens (I won't say who) then the movie turns really weird. At one point Eddie is in Tina's yard and wants to have sex with her. He first prays to God for strength and then on second thought, says, "Forget that, show me a way out." At that moment Tina comes to the window and motions Eddie toward the house.

At another point in the movie Eddie dances the Tango with his mom, who has an orgasm. She is so ashamed she runs to the church to pray. Now in all honesty, the movie is set up as a drama, but I couldn't help but laugh as this film takes on a cult classic "Mommie Dearest" feel.

Language, brief nudity, and a ton of sexual situations. In fact near the end the film uses sexual situations in a juxtaposition for another "comedy" moment.

I loved this film, and perhaps not for the reason why it was made. It might go real good with a buzz. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.