17 May 2004 | Billboard
Do yourself a favor and don't waste your time watching this movie. You'll want that hour and a half of your life back, as do I. Wooden actors, plot holes a mile wide, awful dialogue, and action sequences that my little brother could have choreographed make this hands-down, one of THE worst movies I've seen in a looooooong time. It's so bad you wonder how it ever got made. '13 Dead Men' is the kind of movie you watch for the sole purpose of making fun of it with your friends. Actually, it's the kind of movie you and your friends would make if you were goofing around with a video camera making the script up as you go along.