Hairspray (2007)
John Travolta: Edna Turnblad
Photos
Quotes
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Link Larkin : I was just at home, practicing my new twist on The Twist, when I overheard it on the news. I can't believe Tracy savagely bludgeoned an Eagle Scout. That's just not like her.
Edna Turnblad : But it's not true! I was there! He didn't even bleed.
Link Larkin : I shoulda been there, beside her. I can't sleep. I can't eat...
Edna Turnblad : You can't eat? Well, come on in and worry with us. I'll make you some pork.
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Edna Turnblad : [singing] You can't stop my happiness, 'cuz I like the way I am. And you just can't stop my knife and fork when I see a Christmas ham! And if you don't like the way I look, then I just don't give a damn!
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Wilbur Turnblad : [to Tracy] This is America, babe, you gotta think big to be big.
Edna Turnblad : Big ain't the problem in this family, Wilbur.
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Edna Turnblad : Penny, get home before your mother shoots you.
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Edna Turnblad : Imagine! My little girl... regular, at last.
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Amber von Tussel : [on the phone with Edna, disguising her voice] My name is Mike.
Edna Turnblad : [off-camera] Mike?
Amber von Tussel : Yes, Mike.
Edna Turnblad : Mike who?
Amber von Tussel : [slips back into her normal voice] It's MIKE!
[catches herself, coughs]
Amber von Tussel : Anyway... I'm calling because I have some information about your daughter's whereabouts.
Edna Turnblad : What?
Amber von Tussel : Right now, as we speak, your daughter has entered a hotbed of moral... turpentine.
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Edna Turnblad : Well, I had a dream that I would own a coin-operated laundromat but I came down from that cloud real quickly!
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Amber von Tussel : I lost, Mom. Let's just deal with it!
Velma Von Tussle : [as she pulls the tallies out of her dress] You did not lose! You can not have lost because I switched the damn tallies!
Edna Turnblad : [standing behind a live television camera] Smile, Miss Crabcakes! You're on Candid Camera!
Wilbur Turnblad : That was a good shot! Don't you think?
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Edna Turnblad : They must think my ears are garbage cans. Would you turn that racket down? I'm trying to iron here.
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Link Larkin , Tracy Turnblad , Penny Pingleton , Seaweed : [ending the song "Without Love"] Darlin' you had best believe me, never leave me without love!
Edna Turnblad : [called from off camera] Link, your pork is ready!
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Edna Turnblad : First the hair, now this?
Wilbur Turnblad : But, all the kids are battin' up their hair now, hon.
Edna Turnblad : [to Wilbur] You're no help.
Tracy Turnblad : It's ratting, daddy.
[to Edna]
Tracy Turnblad : And our first lady, Jacqueline Kennedy does it!
Edna Turnblad : I don't believe that.
Tracy Turnblad : What do you mean you don't believe that? How else would it look that way?
Edna Turnblad : I believe that it is naturally stiff.
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[from trailer]
Motormouth Maybelle : [to Edna] Are you sure you wouldn't like to have a little something to eat?
Edna Turnblad : [looks at pot roast] Is that braised?
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Edna Turnblad : If you protest you'll be in files! You'll be on lists! J. Edgar Hoover will still be wire-tapping your cold dead body in the grave.
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Velma Von Tussle : [disgusted] Oh!
[forces a smile]
Velma Von Tussle : Mrs. Turnblad! I'd know whose mother you were ANYWHERE.
[notices Edna's outfit]
Velma Von Tussle : Oh, let me guess - new dress?
Edna Turnblad : [nods, shyly but proudly]
Velma Von Tussle : Well... you'll stop traffic!
[laughs]
Edna Turnblad : [looks away, crushed]
Velma Von Tussle : It was nice meeting you... Tracy.
[struts away with Amber, as Edna starts crying]
Tracy Turnblad : Mama, don't you DARE listen to a word she says!
[Edna appears not to hear her]
Tracy Turnblad : Come on! She's just worried that I'm going to win the Miss Teenage Hairspray contest!
Edna Turnblad : [stops crying immediately and looks at Tracy, impressed] ... Really?
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Edna Turnblad : [catching Tracy at Motormouth Maybelle's Record Shop] No call? You just disappear?
[looks Link up and down]
Edna Turnblad : And all mashed up against a crooner!
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[from trailer]
Mr. Pinky : [guessing Edna's sizes] 54-Double D?
Edna Turnblad : Triple E
[chuckles]
Mr. Pinky : [shouts] I hit the Mother Lode!
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Edna Turnblad : No one is auditioning for anything in this household!
Tracy Turnblad : But why not? Why not?
Edna Turnblad : Dancing is not your future. One day, you're going to own Edna's Occidental Laundry.
Tracy Turnblad : I don't want to be a laundress. I want to be famous.
Edna Turnblad : If you want to be famous, learn how to take blood out of car upholstery. That's a skill you can take right to the bank.
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Mr. Pinky : There's my shining star! Fantastic to meet you! I'm Mr. Pinky
Tracy Turnblad : It's so nice to meet you!
Mr. Pinky : Tracy, is this your older sister?
Edna Turnblad : Oh!
[chuckles]
Mr. Pinky : Perhaps you both would like some complimentary couture?
[hands them a tray of doughnuts]
Edna Turnblad : Couture?
Mr. Pinky : [presents Edna with Tracy's spokesgirl contract] Now, if you could just sign here...
Edna Turnblad : Flattery will not distract Miss Turnblad's agent from reading the fine print!
Mr. Pinky : [flabbergasted] Her agent?
Edna Turnblad : [hands Tracy the food tray] Tracy, eat your doughnuts.
[to Mr. Pinky]
Edna Turnblad : Let's talk...
