[from trailer]

Jack: I hate cats!

Puss in Boots: That's not what your mama said!

Ohhh Cat: Ooooooohhhhhh!

[from trailer]

Jill: [dangles Puss over a canyon] Is it true a cat always lands on its feet?

Puss in Boots: No! That is just a rumour, spread by dogs!

[from trailer]

Humpty Dumpty: Do you have any idea what they do to eggs in San Ricardo's prison? I'll tell you this, my friend. It ain't over easy!

Ohhh Cat: Ooooooohhhhhh!

[Of Humpty Dumpty]

Puss in Boots: I always knew you were good inside.

Humpty Dumpty: I'm not a person. I'm not a bird. I'm not even a food. I don't know what I am.

Puss in Boots: You are what you have always been: my brother.

[a man begins to strip to show Puss a tattoo of the golden eggs]

Puss in Boots: NO! Please, you have... shown enough.

Puss in Boots: You have made the cat angry. You do not want to make the cat angry!

[from trailer]

Puss in Boots: My name would become legend...

[from trailer]

Puss in Boots: Fear me, if you dare!

Puss in Boots: I will see you again, Kitty Softpaws!

Kitty Softpaws: Sooner than you think.

[Puss realizes that Kitty has his boots]

Puss in Boots: She is a bad kitty.

Humpty Dumpty: [hanging from a rope] You can't save us both!

Puss in Boots: Yes, I can!

Humpty Dumpty: Puss, you have to save the baby or the mother will kill everyone in San Ricardo.

Puss in Boots: I will not let you go!

Humpty Dumpty: I know you won't. I won't let you choose.

[lets go]

[Puss and Kitty kiss]

Ohhh Cat: Ooooooohhhhhh!

Kitty Softpaws: That's a lot of heel for a guy, don't you think?

Puss in Boots: Kitty? You are not as good as they say. You are better!

Puss in Boots: How *dare* you do the Litter Box at me?

[from trailer]

[Puss in Boots removes his hat, cloak and sword]

Puss in Boots: All that I need, are the boots!

[from trailer]

[Puss jumps over a steeple, the tip scraping his tail]

Puss in Boots: [shaken] Holy frijoles...

[from trailer]

Puss in Boots: My thirst for adventure will never be quenched!

Jack: We want a complimentary continental breakfast.

Jill: And don't even think of skimping on them baby muffins!

Hotel Owner: [crying to himself] We don't have any baby muffins.

Raoul: [taking an inventory of Puss in Boots' items before placing him in jail] ... one bottle of catnip!

Puss in Boots: It's for my glaucoma.

Humpty Dumpty: First rule of Bean Club, don't talk about Bean Club. The second rule of Bean Club... don't talk about Bean Club.

Kitty Softpaws: [to Puss] You hit me in the head with a guitar!

Crazy Woman: [beats up Puss] Chupacabra! Chupacabra! Chupacabra!

Puss in Boots: You are a crazy woman!

[from trailer]

Kitty Softpaws: [to Puss, wearing his hat] I'll steal you blind, and you'll never even know I was there!

[an annoyed Puss grabs his hat back]

Kitty Softpaws: [In a calm voice] You owe me.

Puss in Boots: I owe you?

Kitty Softpaws: [starts to flirt with Puss] Uh-huh. You hit me in the head with a guitar.

Puss in Boots: I, uh, regret the guitar.

Kitty Softpaws: Okay, I forgive you.

[Taking Puss' bag of money]

Kitty Softpaws: [sing-song voice] Someone forgot his money!

Puss in Boots: Don't make the cat angry...