The Wicker Man

Any movie-goer who has ever watched a movie critic at any point has probably heard of this movie. Wicker Man joins the ranks of films such as The Room, Troll 2, and Battlefield Earth as a hilarious accident that is lightning in a bottle. First of all, I don't know why this remake exists. The original is a cult classic that had some genuinely great moments. I guess that made it a prime target for Hollywood, so here it is. All of the dialog in this movie, and I mean EVERY. SINGLE. LINE. is hilariously bad or just awkward, or sometimes both. The acting is just awful. Nick Cage turns the scenery chewing up to eleven, and everyone else is either not talented enough or trying too hard to act. Really the strongest parts of this movie are act one and act three. Most of the classic terrible lines (NOT THE BEES! HOW'D IT GET BURNED? What's in the bag, a shark or something?) are in those acts, and enough is happening to keep you entertained. However, the second act where the actual investigating is occurring is just boring. It is incredibly repetitive and turns into just a generic boring investigation flick. I realize that there isn't a film out there that is hilariously terrible for the entire running time, but this one tries. If you can find it for a dollar, and want to see Hollywood gone oh so wrong, give this a try. If you like bad movies, you've seen this already.

Anyone not aware of the 1973 original British Lion movie ' The Wicker Man' would,no doubt, have left the cinema with the impression 'Poor' and 'Peurile'.

As a devotee of the original I left with the impression Purely Poor.

From the grim reality of haggle toothed inbreds drawing the force of law and order into a web of paganistic barbaric ritual on a remote Scottish island, named Summerisle(the original) to a near Amazon-ic colony off the Maine coast of the US, named Summersisle, the remake hardly hits the spot.

This is, quite sadly, a case of what 'could' have been a classic remake of a classic being tampered with to cater for a simple minded public. NOTHING MORE AND NOTHING LESS.

Gentlemen (or given the reworked context of the film) Ladies involved ... hang your heads in shame.

This movie is the biggest waste of nine dollars that I've spent in a very, very long time. If you knew how often I went to the movies you'd probably say, that's hard to imagine, but never-the-less, it's true! After seeing the trailer for this movie, I knew that I had to see it! If you're a fan of horror, mystery, and suspense, why wouldn't you? The trailer is nothing less than intriguing and exciting; unfortunately, the movie is none of these.

From the cinematography, to the script, to the acting, this movie is a complete flop. If you're reading this, planning to go to the movie expecting some thrills, mystery, action, horror, or anything other than a waste of an hour and forty-five minutes I'm afraid you are in for disappointment.

"Why is it so bad," you might be asking yourself. Let me tell you. The movie was neither mysterious nor suspenseful. Nothing about the movie made me the least bit "on edge," frightened, or curious. The script was at best laughable. There were numerous times throughout the film where the dialogue was just so ridiculous I began to write it off as comic relief only to find out a few seconds later that it wasn't. The acting was absolutely dreadful. I like Nicholas Cage but this was a miss. Without exception, every performance in this movie was incredibly below average. The cinematography was awful with not one moment of suspense or mystique. Finally, the story is completely transparent. You can see the end of this movie coming a mile away.

I am not usually a very harsh critic. Frankly, when I go to see a comedy I want to laugh and when I go to see a mystery/suspense/horror, I just want to be surprised. This movie was boring, poorly acted, poorly written, and an overwhelming disappointment. Do yourself a favor and go see something else.

A bad movie is a bad movie but a bad remake is something else entirely. This film doesn't just do a bad job of retelling the original story it takes everything that was good about it and replaces it with a witless and disjointed story.

Nicolas Cage is well cast as a man addicted to some kind of over the counter drugs. I was sick to death of his muttering and dopey face within about five minutes, you might find his routine wearing thin a little faster or slower depending on your tolerance. I think he might have done a little too much preparation for his role. Watching Nicolas Cage mumble his way through the script is quite painful at times, like seeing an elderly dog trying to chase a postman on arthritic legs and not understanding why he can't quite do it anymore.

The original story was quite chilling but here it's all kind of a joke. There's something really repulsive about a director remaking a film when they clearly haven't taken the time to understand the original. The plot is weaker than you would believe without seeing it and the whole war of the sexes thing is just not interesting. The director of this film should be forcibly prevented from remaking any more films, this film is a big fat insult to a classic movie and a sign of how cynical and artless Hollywood has become. Sad times.

Don't let the premise fool you--this was one funny movie. The problem--it wasn't supposed to be a comedy. The story sets you up nicely for an ending that never comes. Even worse, the set-up is NEVER explained. You will leave the theater asking "Is that it?" I rate it a 2 simply because there were a few brief moments of promise, but the finish leaves you completely flat. Nicholas Cage did as good a job as can be expected in the role, but he had very little to work with. There are odd quirks, and interesting turns everywhere, which had absolutely nothing to do with the movie. Let this one come out on video before wasting your money.