Sgt. Floyd Pepper: Can you believe this cat?

Sam The Eagle: I am not a cat, I am a bird.

Sgt. Floyd Pepper: You may be a bird, but you ain't the bird.

Sam The Eagle: Do we want an eighth deadly sin for the pageant?

Nigel: Which one?

Sam The Eagle: [Into phone] Who's your eight?

[To Nigel]

Sam The Eagle: Wearing funny pants to a funeral.