11 June 2006 | lawfella
Ron Jeremy with his pants on?
Found this one in a collection of low budget DVDs at Best Buy, 6 cheapies for $6.99. Imagine my surprise when I saw Ron Jeremy's name pop up in the opening credits. Had they slipped a porno film into the collection? No! It is really Ron Jeremy in a straight role, following the lead of Ginger Lynn Allen (I guess). And he did pretty well, doing a tongue in cheek L.A cop trying to solve a series of hilariously violent murders.
And about those murders. Seems a girl was hauled into prison one night for some bizarre reason and during her stay there, she happens to have been murdered by some of the other prisoners. Could happen to anyone, I guess, especially when they are in the care of the LAPD. So our victim's lovely sister Charlie (Phoebe Dollar), who gives the old Charles Bronson vigilante film Death Wish the same deference as religious fundamentalists give holy scripture, takes it upon herself to track down and kill everyone involved.
And Ron Jeremy is the detective assigned to the case. He's got a problem -- all of the victims are criminals he hates. He secretly thinks Charlie is doing a lot of good with her murderous ways, and becomes ambivalent about whether or not he ought to stop her. And he keeps his pants on, for the entire flick -- a good thing since he has aged a bit since the days when he cavorted about with the likes of Christy Canyon and Veronica Hart. Not that I have seen any of those movies myself, of course, but, er, I have a friend who told me about them. Ahem.
Also wandering through this film for some reason, though I can't imagine what it might be, is a Michael Moore parody, an NRA-hating documentary filmmaker whose self-described masterpiece was a film showing that Sonny Bono's death was actually a murder, carried out by a conspiracy. Well, why not. He runs an investigation of the murders parallel to Jeremy's, almost complicating the pathetically simple plot.
An odd film to be sure, but more entertaining than you might think. The special effects are often hilarious, Ms. Dollar is slinky and seductive, and yes, there is Ron Jeremy fully clothed. Didn't know he had it in him.