Knocked Up (2007)

Kristen Wiig: Jill

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jack : ...there's gonna be some things that you are going to be able to get, that other people in the office don't get... one of them: Gym membership.

  Alison Scott : You want me to lose weight?

  Jack : [laughing]  No, I don't want you to lose weight!

  Jill : No, uh, we can't legally ask you to do that.

  Jack : We didn't say lose weight... I might say tighten.

  Alison Scott : Tight?

  Jack : Tighter.

  Jill : Just liked toned and smaller.

  Jack : Don't make everything smaller, I don't wanna generalize that way... tighter.

  Jill : We don't want you to lose weight, we just want you to be healthy. Y'know, by eating less.

  Alison Scott : OK.

  Jill : We would just like it if you go home and step on the scale, and write down how much you weigh, and subtract it by like, 20.

  Alison Scott : 20.

  Jill : And then weigh that much.

• Jill : Oh, no, we're not asking you to lose weight. That would be illegal. We just want you to be healthy, by eating less. So go home, weigh yourself on a scale, write than down. Then subtract 20 from that number. And weigh that. Yeah.

• Jack : We decided that, we want you to be on camera.

  Alison Scott : Oh my god, really?

  Jill : I know, I was so surprised too.

• Jill : This is Hollywood. We don't like liars.

• Jack : So, we did some research, and, turns out, people like pregnant.

  Alison Scott : Oh my God!

  Jack : The bigger you are, the bigger your numbers.

  Jill : I was surprised, because I feel the opposite.

• Jill : [walking past Alison]  Hey, Alison, great job.

  Alison Scott : Oh, thanks!

  Jill : [walking away]  ... for you...