Edward
Peter Pervertsky
White Bitch
Lucy
Susan Pervertsky (as Faune Chambers)
Willy Wonka
Bink
Mr. Tumnus (as Hector Jimenez)
Captain Jack Swallows
Mystique
Aslo
Museum Curator
Harry Potter
Ron Weasley
Hermione Granger
Flight Attendant
Albus Dumbledore
Cyclops (as Tad Hilgenbrinck)
Magneto
Wolverine (as Groovy)
Storm
Rogue
Nacho Libre
Chanchito
Borat / Pirate with Eye Patch
Ashton Kutcher
Samuel Jackson
Kanye West (as Cordele Taylor)
Paris Hilton
Mel Gibson
Singing Pirate Girl
Flavor Flav
P. Diddy Faun
Lauren Conrad
Harry Beaver (voice) (as Katt M. Williams)
Lead Archer
Woodsman
Aslo's Camp Band
Pirate with Heart
Pirate (as Daniel Joseph)
Pirate
Pirate Wench
Pirate Wench (as Pollyanna Salas-Uruena)
Pirate Wench (as Sara Underwood)
Cribs Faun
Aslo's Girl
Jogging Girl
Wardrobe Girl
James Bond
Bond Girl (as Brooklyn Freed)
Bond Girl (as Michelle Misty Lang)
Blacksmith
Silas the Monk (as David Whatley)
Prison Guard
Breast Bite Woman
Nose Bite Guy
Crotch Bite Guy
Morphed Mystique
Thug
Narrator (voice)
Oompa Loompa
Willy Dance Double
Curator Dance Double (as Richard Steeio Vasquez)
Dancing Pirate Girl
Dancing Pirate Girl (as Samantha Lee)
Breakdancing Pirate (as Philip 'Spee-D' Albuquerque)
Breakdancing Pirate (as Jaime "Venum" Brugos III)
Breakdancing Pirate (as Oren 'Flearock' Michaeli)
Dancing Soldier
Madd Chadd
Michael Jackson
Daniel
Warrior (uncredited)
Stormtrooper (uncredited)
The Hot Nun (uncredited)
Man-Boobs! (uncredited)
Silas (uncredited)
Faun (uncredited)
Oompa Loompa (uncredited)
Monk #3 - Nacho Libre spoof (uncredited)
Rubeus Hagrid (uncredited)