16 December 2008 | equazcion
Dude, where's my plot?
Whoa, dude, it like, totally doesn't exist.
This has got to be the slowest and most shallow film I've ever seen. The plot is so thin it's nearly invisible. Once the conflict is set up it's mostly abandoned, and when the resolution comes, it's abrupt and shamelessly contrived. The story is resolved within a span of 5 minutes at the end, and nothing that comes before has any bearing on it.
Also, despite the claimed genre of "comedy", this only barely qualifies. Aside from a few funny lines here and there, this is really not a funny movie. It doesn't even seem to be intended as such. Perhaps it was supposed to be a "surfing movie" instead, which it might have accomplished, if not for the remarkable lack of actual scenes involving people surfing.
This is more like a long stoner fantasy. Really, it's like seeing the dream of a passed-out stoner. You can just see one waking up and going, "Dude, I just had this dream, where I was Matthew McConaughey, only I was like, this famous surfer, and then these corporate dudes were trying to bring me down, but I didn't care and decided to sit on the beach for a couple months."
Or to draw another comparison, it's like listening to an hour and a half of psychedelic music, in that the sober people in the room will be bored, but the stoned people will see all kinds of depth and colors.
This seems to have been made by stoners, for stoners. The only reason I can come up with for this getting made is that it was written, greenlit, directed, and in the end only appreciated by people whose minds have been burned out by too much sun and too many drugs. It's so slow and uneventful that you could watch it and follow the story accurately while simultaneously doing your taxes.
But hey, maybe I just don't have enough laid-back beach bum in me to appreciate something like this. It was after all a good-looking production, with good acting, lots of hot women in bikinis (and a couple without), and pretty beach scenery. Though again, if, like me, you insist on things like an actual story and interesting events occurring in your movies, you're probably best off skipping this.