Witless Protection (2008)

PG-13   |    |  Comedy, Crime

Witless Protection (2008) Poster

The story centers on a small-town Sheriff who witnesses what he believes is a kidnapping, and rushes to rescue a woman. The kidnappers turn out to be F.B.I. Agents assigned to protect her ... See full summary »




  • Ivana Milicevic and Larry the Cable Guy in Witless Protection (2008)
  • Ivana Milicevic in Witless Protection (2008)
  • Larry the Cable Guy in Witless Protection (2008)
  • Jenny McCarthy and Larry the Cable Guy in Witless Protection (2008)
  • Ivana Milicevic and Larry the Cable Guy in Witless Protection (2008)
  • Eric Roberts and Peter Stormare in Witless Protection (2008)

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14 June 2019 | rooprect
| Ok I admit I laughed at one of the (many) fart jokes
I counted 6 fart jokes (unless one squeaked by undetected), and as you'd expect they were mostly juvenile and awkward except one--the airport security gag--which was funny enough to warrant a hearty LOL out of me. And I think that sums the movie up pretty accurately: most of the humor is predictable and offensive, but hey, 1 out of 6 zingers might work for you.

The plot of "Witless Protection" isn't half bad. It's about a redneck ne'er-do-well, Larry, who makes a colossally stupid guess that he sees a crime in progress, and his misguided righteous redneck mentality prompts him to get tangled up in a big mess trying to protect a reluctant damsel in distress who doesn't want anything to do with him. Larry's bumbling stupidity is matched only by his surprisingly keen instincts, and as things unfold, you realize maybe Larry isn't as dumb as he looks.

A few farts later, you realize that yeah, he IS as dumb as he looks. But no matter, the story moves along keeping us interested enough, and as I said, you've got a 1 in 6 probability of being surprised with a really funny gag.

The comedy is straightforward redneck humor, meaning it's a mix of self-deprecating stupidity, gross-out pride, overhanging gut scenes and low key racist humor. By 'low key racist' I mean jokes sort of like Archie Bunker where we are supposed to laugh at how ignorant he is.

But let's take a paragraph to talk about that real quick. Ignorant/racist humor only works when there's an intelligent character in the mix to balance things out. An excellent example would be Mel Brooks' "Blazing Saddles" which has so many racist characters you'd think the KKK were handing out free torches, BUT Gene Wilder and Cleavon Little put them in their place with superior intelligence so we, the audience, never feel awkward laughing at the gags.

But here in "Witless Protection" there's not really an intelligent character to deliver the punchline, so some of the self-deprecating racist jokes remain open ended. An example is when Larry goes to a motel that's operated by an Indian man (I'm guessing from the horribly contrived accent), and Larry proceeds to unleash a barrage of insults such as "diaper head" and whatnot. We, the audience, are waiting for the punchline... like maybe the Indian guy turns out to be a Harvard graduate who puts Larry in his place. But no, the scene just sort of ends. Big fail there, writers: you may want to brush up on your Mel Brooks before taking a crack at another script.

Another fail worth noting is that, despite the DVD cover, posters and promos heavily featuring Jenny McCarthy, she only appears in 3 or 4 scenes.

So overall, this flick wasn't horrible, but it certainly wasn't great. Lots of missed opportunities. But 1 in 6 farts hit the mark.

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