I admit, after seeing the trailer for "Year One," I had fairly high hopes that this would be a summer comedy that might actually be funny and make me feel good for a couple of hours. And, in these dark times, something that would take the edge off and console me with more than a few guffaws would be more than appreciated.
How extremely disappointing then to sit through a movie that seemed to be "Caveman" spliced together with '10,000 B.C." and "Monty Python's Meaning of Life" and then left in a public urinal for a month. The smell of a bloated, rotting corpse washed up on the shore of the East River in July has a more pleasant aroma than this pile of sludge that could - should - have been so much better.
"Year One," directed by comedy vet Harold Ramis (who helmed such classics as "Caddyshack," "National Lampoon's Vacation," "Groundhog Day" and "Analyze This"), begins well enough, with Zeb (Jack Black not as much in buffoon mode as in "Be Kind, Rewind" or "Nacho Libre") and Oh (Michael Cera, playing the same sad sack, moping teen he did in "Superbad" and "Juno") as outcast Neandrethals booted from their "Quest For Fire" clan and forced to travel to parts unknown.
The story then turns to the Book of Genesis for inspiration as they first meet Cain and Abel (David Cross and Paul Rudd), then Adam (Ramis), as well as Abraham (Hank Azaria, "The Simpsons," "the birdcage") and his stoner son, Isaac (David Mintz-Plasse, "Superbad").
Now, I'm no biblical scholar, but I did not know Adam and Abraham were alive at the same time. I could be wrong, though. Historically, one would have to accept passing references to modern terms such as "lesbian," "gay," "dick" and "balls" among other latter-day words we take for granted, but they certainly would not have been around in this film's time-frame.
I know I'm reading WAY to much into this, but I also know is that these scenes were ripe for big laughs, but only a few were realized. Instead, the writers felt it necessary to substitute scenes of Jack Black devouring a turd and Cera urinating on himself.
I did like the sequence where Zeb and Oh experience riding in a cart for the first time (even though it moved at about one mile an hour); the wagon chase scene (as brief as it was) was also pretty funny. That was it, however.
The moronic duo then spends the rest of the film in Sodom (of Sodom and Gamorrah infamy) trying to free a a pair of comely slaves, Maya (June Diane Raphael, "Forgetting Sarah Marshall") and Eema (Juno Temple, "Notes On a Scandal"). Here, while Black pretends to be "The Chosen One" (which is an excuse to overact, no doubt), Cera is presented with his third or fourth homo-erotic situation, this time he's painted bright gold by a fat, bald eunuch and then forced to rub oil on the stomach of a pudgy Oliver Pratt (I'll be losing my lunch now, thank you).
I won't write about the dimwitted conclusion or if Zeb and Oh get the girls or not. I won't because by the time the movie ended, I was thoroughly disgusted. Not so much by the constant pee, poop, flatulence and sex jokes that substituted for real comedy, but by the wasted potential of a good cast, writers and a director that's supposed to know from funny.
I laughed out loud just a few times, but more often than not, I found myself coming up with jokes and situations that were funnier than what I was seeing (and I'm just not that funny). That, coupled with some sequences that just did not know how to end and the fact that characters were really dying and getting maimed and injured made this one terrible movie and one of the worst "comedies" of the year.
And, if all of that wasn't enough, the movie ends with the world's most depressing set of outtakes. I didn't need this kind of picture in my life right now and believe me, neither do you.
