User reviews

Greetings again from the darkness. All it took was one look at the cast for me to agree to watch and review this mob film. It's the first feature film from writer-director Jimmy Giannopoulos, and he co-wrote the screenplay with Diomedes Raul Bermudez and Shiloh Fernandez (who also stars). Most will agree the world never really needs another mob movie, but gosh, when they work, they are quite fun to watch. Filmmakers Guy Ritchie and Martin Scorsese have figured this out.

And then there are those that try hard, but for whatever reason, it doesn't quite click. Sometimes too many characters are crammed in to execute (pun intended) as many familiar mob movie tropes as possible. Director Giannopoulos opens his film with a flashback scene from 10 years ago. The rest of the movie takes place in one evening - one that goes better for some than others. Gio (co-writer Shiloh Fernandez) is dressed in his suit as this is the night "the family" celebrates the death of his father 10 years prior. Gio's mother (Lorraine Bracco) has baked the titular cake, as she has done each of the previous years. She tells Gio she does this "for your father." Gio then sets out to walk the streets of Brooklyn in order to bring the cake to his Uncle Angelo's house for the celebration.

Gio is good-natured and prefers talking and smiling his way through confrontations, rather than the violent tendencies of those around him. Most of the movie revolves around his interactions along the way - with some friendlies and some not-so-friendlies. It seems his chocolate allergy comes up in conversation enough times that we know it will come into play at some point. If it's not his food allergy, then it's the whereabouts of his Cousin Leo (Emery Cohen) that makes up most of the conversations we hear. Leo is recently out of prison, but hasn't contacted his mother yet ... a real no-no in the family. Leo had previously crossed a Puerto Rican gang and now he's missing - hence all the questions.

If you come for the story, you'll likely be disappointed. This is more a series of vignettes featuring familiar faces such as Luis Guzman as a concerned Uber driver, William Fichtner as a man with a violent nature, and John Magaro, Aldis Hodge, Ashley Benson, Vincent Pastore (of course), Penn Badgley, Jeremy Allen White, and even Marla Maples (yes, the former Mrs. Trump). Once at the party, Gio meets with an ailing Uncle Carmine played by Paul Sorvino, and best of all, Uncle Angelo played by Val Kilmer. If you have not heard, Mr. Kilmer had throat cancer and now speaks through a voice box. Subtitles are utilized to assist viewers. Watching him act with his eyes and body language is a pleasure, and it's great to have him back on the big screen. The final big name to appear in the film is Ewan McGregor as Father Kelly, who has an early scene with David Mazouz ("Gotham") as young Gio, and a later scene with modern day Gio and his mother.

We follow Gio in his strange, messy night ... think AFTER HOURS (1985) ... only mob-related, and lacking most of the dark comedic touches. Other than Fernandez, most of the actors are only in a scene or two, so there's a novelty effect that doesn't seem quite right for this genre. Paul Sorvino has only a solitary two-word line of dialogue that starts with an F and ends with you. Still a well-executed crescendo of death and getting to see so many familiar faces in one film makes it worth sticking till the end.

In theaters and On Demand June 18, 2021.

Lots of great stars, playing characters that are not fleshed out at all, and super amateur feel to whole thing. $6.99 was wayyyyy too much to waste on this. If you're curious, wait til it's .99 or free- then it won't hurt as much when it's over.

Omg why did I waste so much time watching this to the end, it was completely nonsensical from beginning to the end! From the ridiculous script to the awful acting, really just nonsense!

The story does not make sense because things are very poorly explained. I don't understand a thing they are trying to convey. I watched this for Ewan McGregor, and he is in it for one minute. A huge disappointment.

I went into this movie knowing nothing and it was the first movie I watched in the theaters since the end of 2019. I only give it two stars because it is comically bad and I did get a morbid sense of amusement from how bad it was. The soundtrack conflicts with the images on screen often and there are these jarring guitar stings that come incrementally that blow your ears out. They got a cast with some names and it comes across as if they all only chose to do it on the condition that they only would have to show up for one day. It comes across as lazy and it also has a bunch of plot lines that never crescendo to anything, it just pads time. I don't know who this movie is for, but if you want a good laugh from a bad movie then this is the one for you.

A waste of a good cast. I'd love to see a breakdown of the economics behind this (i.e. How much it took for reputable actors to attach their names to this project).

I was quite excited when I saw the list of actors and couldn't believe I had not heard of this film. Now I know why. What a stinker it is.

This movie makes no sense whatsoever...just random acts of violence all over the place with no explanation. I thought we would get it sorted at the end since the Storyline indicated Gio's 'life is changed after witnessing murder, violence' etc and 'the truth about what happened to his father'. I saw the violence but I must be a bit slow because I have no idea what happened to Gio's father or why...or what the truth is. I don't even know why the other actors' lives end...how they are connected to each other...how they are connected to Gio or his father....or what they are involved in...I am quite serious...This film is BAD.

Dragged on, lots of fluff, cameos and then when you thought it was all coming together...credits

Don't bother...

Totally zero i.regret.for every secound waste it for this shhhhhi****

I decided to watch this movie because Penn Badgley. The movie was about a boy name Gio attending a celebration for his fathers 10th death anniversary at Mob boss Angelo house and he was responsible for bringing the yearly traditional cake his mother makes. On the other hand, his cousin Leo had everyone in the neighborhood looking for him because he got caught by the feds transporting drugs and world on the streets he was a rat. In my opinion, we needed more of a back story to why Gio's father was killed and what was the purpose behind Sophia killing the mob family ..

Worst movie in 10 years. Made it through, but it was the pits. Made no sense whatsoever, the plot is non existent..just a guy walking around with a cake.

Fans of mafia movies will like Birthday Cake. It's a simple story, and it doesn't take long for you get invested in the main character, Gio. The cast is stacked with a bunch of talent, And I had a good time watching it.

The editing is a bit sketchy and the sound quality is atrocious. I had a hard time understanding the dialogue so I had to turn on the subtitles.

I mainly wanted to leave a review to score it fairly for those with an open mind. It's much better than a 3 or 4 out of 10 like IMDb has it scored. The talented cast alone makes it worth watching. Check it out.

One of the worst, most amateur, cliched 'mob' representations I've ever seen! Save yourself from fast forwarding through this tripe. Intrusive sound drowning out dialogue (probably just as well really!); glacial progress of protagonist as he e.g. Puts on a shirt; takes cake to party... and to top it all an embarrassing 'cool priest' cameo from Ewan McGregor (ahem... artistic integrity?). Dear, oh dear.

Shockingly awful! Val Kilmer character is laughable.

How they managed to pull that cast together an produce such a steaming pile of effluent..... script is terrible, cliches abound and the storyline drags on to to a not believable ending.

The directors/writers had the acting talent and even a story line to Tweak the script which needed tweaking. I watched until 40mins left and still none of the major actors yet to show their faces in this movie,

Story buildup far too slow, writing and directing was awful.

If you read the synopsis of this movie you will think that you know what to expect. Wrong.

The editor should be put out to grass and possibly the director also

The premise is fine. The actors are good and could be great.

The result is very disappointing because a tighter script and better backing track could have resulted in a decent film

We suspect that the editor's first language is not English. Otherwise, the finished product is inexplicable.

Rumour has it hes still walking around with that cake, awful movie. Truely pathetic. How its rated 5 stars on sky cinema is beyond me. Avoid at all costs.

Gio (Shiloh Fernandez) is bringing a birthday cake to a gathering of his family of criminals. His mother had made the cake special. His father died 10 years ago and the cake is dedicated to his late father's birthday.

I like the turn. It's a big swing. I appreciate big swings even if it ends in a foul ball. That's what we have here. The swing is hard and the effort is there. In the end, it's a close miss. With such a big turn, the movie needs to set it up better. Quite frankly, I had to rewatch the first part. First of all, the father is not set up at all. The audience may require some father son time. Second, Gio actually has little to do with the cake. It would be more compelling if he's the one who specialized the cake. It's more retroactively compelling. There are a lot of big acting talents here but they are not filling out the screen. The style is deliberate indie and those star power is somehow diminished. This is a near miss but sometimes, those can be interesting.

Has a thoughtful redemptive message about how sometimes those of us ho are unwitting about how to find understanding and justice in important parts of our family lives have God help save us from evil in those who are close to us,and whom should be protecting us from harm. Do, we have to be killers to have good life? This film suggests not. Others and God sometimes protect us.

I think we expected more. This is the kind of film that follows mob family movies like Godfather and Sopranos -- even some of the same actors -- and a lot less happens than we'd wish, and it's not as clever as it wishes. Excellent quality overall but for me the blandness of the story makes it a waste of a great group of talent.

Incredible that a star-studded cast came together to do this hop-along-Cazadeesh of a flick. Every sequence of this movie is a direct lift off of some other Mafia or mob'ish movie. Even the utterly LOUSY and I do mean obviously ear-bending music/constant-cacophonous noise is appropriated.

I have to wonder what on earth the financiers and then the actors were thinking when they signed on...or were they?!

One of the worst I've seen in a while. An indie drama set in a mafia world with a twist ending you'll see a mile off. A director who has no control of his actors who unsurprisingly look and sound extremely bored by the whole process. Ewan McGregor showing up for a cameo, Shiloh Fernandez proving entirely unlikeable as the lead, and Val Kilmer in a sorry state. A disaster.