Fish Evolving Legs: [Bravely Emerges from the Primordial Ocean]

Time-Travelling UKIP Supporter: [Appears on the Shore, beats the Fish Evolving Legs with a Newspaper until it swims away, and then returns to his Time Machine and Disappears back to the Modern Era. Reappears, runs remorsefully back to the Sea. A Large Predator Worm emerges and bites his head off. His body flails around and slumps onto the sand. His UKIP Rosette floats mournfully in the water]

Stewart Lee: It's a terrible story, Paddy McGinty's Goat.

Paddy McGinty's Goat: It's all true!

Stewart Lee: I never said it wasn't.

Stewart Lee: People ask me what it was that made me want to be a Comedian. And I never wanted to be a Comedian. I wanted to be a Cow.

Stewart Lee: [Ironik the Rapper] He twatted that he was on his way to Southend, then he twatted that he was on his way back home, and then he got mugged outside his house...

Gerbil: [Dances on the Berlin Wall]

Gerbil Lee Harvey Oswald: [shoots Gerbil JFK's brains out as the Gerbil Motorcade passes through Gerbil Dealey Plaza]