11 March 2019 | lor_
Paul Thomas cranked out about a dozen features starring the Vivid contract Love twins, and this one sat on the shelf for over 2 years in that bygone age of overproduction (before the internet effectively kiilled off the profitability of porn DVDs).
This stinker tries to be cutesy in something of an homage to perhaps Lindsay Lohan and even John Hughes comedies with insulting results. The twins, whose inability to act even at a minimal porn level, will come into an inheritance of $39,000,000 from their grandfather if they successfully intern for a year at the Miracle Research Lab, run by Steven St. Croix in a NonSex role. This production is so chintzy that the lab looks like the back storage area of a restaurant rather than some scientific facility.
Very poor attempts at humor make the mercifully brief (72 minutes of running time harking back to the standard for a Vivid quickie back in the 1990s) feature difficult to sit through. Main gag has the twins assigned to deliver in their pretty as pink VW Beetle vials of sperm identified from Chinese, Mexican and Indian donors, which are stolen from them. An orgy is arranged in order to replace the samples (featuring Daisy Marie and Brooke Banner to briefly spell the twins from dominating all the sex in the movie), only to find out, hardy har har, that St. Croix gave them bull sperm rather than human to deliver.
Add James Deen as a retarded worker who gets to hump the twins (and is "comically" threatened with pegging when he requests some ass pleasuring) and you have a textbook example of low-grade porn.