Fabian: My name is Fabian, and I would like you to recommend to me someone who could paint something like this.

[uncovers painting]

Fabian: Who did this?

Artist: [surprised] Rembrandt.

Fabian: Who?

Artist: Rembrandt.

Fabian: Give me his address. Now.

Artist: He's dead.

Fabian: Dead? When?

Artist: 300 years ago.

[repeated line]

Rose: What do you weigh?

Mike: Give me the gun.

Tony: I'm serious! You know I'm a terrible shot. I could easily aim at your head and blow your balls off.

Victor Maynard: [after rescuing Rose who has been shoplifting] That was unbelievably irresponsible! Staggeringly immature!

Tony: Staggeringly... staggering!

Rose: Fig roll anyone?


Tony: Tsk... tsk... tsk...


Tony: I'll have one.

Rose: Get lost.

Tony: Not fair! Mr Maynard!

[Victor shoots and kills Barney]

Rose: [screams]

Victor Maynard: Get in the car.

Rose: You killed him!

Victor Maynard: I had to, he was going to kill you.

Rose: Oh, okay. Get in the car!

Victor Maynard: My name is Victor Maynard, and i am 54 years old and I work as a professional killer.

Parrot: I love you, Mr Maynard!

Victor Maynard: What the fuck?

Tony: [after catching a knife mid-air, in awe to Rose and Victor] Did you see that?

Rose: See what?

Tony: [Disappointed] Shit...

Rose: It's like everywhere you go, there's that smell.

Victor Maynard: What smell?

Rose: Cleanliness. Bleach. It's like being in a hospital. It's so safe, it's dangerous. I can't breathe here. I mean it, I'm frightened. I'm frightened if I stay here much longer, I'll end up like you. Afraid of everything.

Rose: It's funny because yesterday I couldn't wait to get away and now I never want to leave.

Tony: What happened in between?

Rose: Just enough.

Victor Maynard: Tony, come and see what happens if you don't clean your gun.

[last lines]

Tony: Has anyone seen the cat?

[Ferguson is in traction]

Hector Dixon: How is your assistant?

[He indicates Mike, who is lying in a coma next to Ferguson]

Ferguson: They want to turn him off.

Hector Dixon: Hmm... perhaps that would be for the best.

Ferguson: No, he's been paid through the end of the month. And anyway, he's company.

Hector Dixon: Where is he?

[Rose says nothing]

Hector Dixon: Tell me...

[indicates Fabian]

Hector Dixon: Or I'll cut his finger off, and make you swallow it. Then I'll leave you alone with him.

[hearing a disturbance, Victor emerges from his bedroom, gun in hand]

Rose: This hideous old bat in a wheelchair just tried to kill me! She had a knife this big, I swear!

Tony: It was horrible!

Rose: It's true!

[embarrassed, Victor goes to the door of Rose's bedroom]

Victor Maynard: Mother... Mother, are you there? It's me. Mother?

[hearing nothing, he kneels down to look through the keyhole]

Victor Maynard: [to Rose and Tony] I've got everything under control...

[a shotgun blasts a hole in the door over Victor's head. Rose screams]

Victor Maynard: She means well. Mother, can we talk about this?

Louisa Maynard: I'm *very* disappointed in you, Victor!

Ferguson: [wakes up in the hospital, still in traction] Morning!

[No response from Mike, who is still in his coma]

Ferguson: Dear God, Mike... you were dull before.

[Victor, Rose and Tony are being held at gunpoint by Dixon and Fabian]

Victor Maynard: Did they torture you?

Rose: No, I gave them your address straight away.

Victor Maynard: Good girl.

[She beams]