Burning Palms

Burning Palms (2010) is a satirical thriller movie written and directed by Christopher Landon and it was very mediocre.

Positives for Burning Palms (2010): It was interesting for me to see Christopher Landon directing a movie that isn't horror. The movie has an insanely awesome ensemble cast including Adriana Barraza, Lake Bell, Jamie Chung, Shannen Doherty, Robert Hoffman, Rosamund Pike, Peter Macdissi, Dylan McDermott, Anson Mount, Jon Polito, Zoe Saldana, Nick Stahl and Paz Vega. The five short stories are interesting for their stories and what they were saying. And finally, I liked the comic book style transitions to each story.

Negatives for Burning Palms (2010): There are spots in these stories that are a little bit dumb to watch. I didn't care about a lot of these damn characters. Some of them kind of act like dirt bags. And finally, the endings to these stores with the exception of the second one were really dumb.

Overall, Burning Palms (2010) is an interesting if not messy satirical thriller movie by Christopher Landon and it marked the beginning of a very successful and promising career for the guy.

Not anywhere near as good as what the synopsis would have you think. The stories are not interconnected at all and the plots are mostly very predictable. Is quite gritty, but in some cases this is a bad thing: the characters are so loathsome you just want the individual story to end.

The set-up for most of the punch-lines is pretty good, but the conclusions often feel rushed, contrived and out-of-the-blue.

Despite its amateurish plot, the cast are mostly stars: Rosamund Pike, Dylan McDermott, Shannen Doherty, Zoe Saldana, Paz Vega, Nick Stahl, Performances are mostly pretty good. Shannen Doherty does put on the worst English accent ever though, assuming that's what she was aiming for.

I thought this was terrific although I have not seen the last story yet. Very funny and NON PC which is refreshing.

I am surprised I highly recommend this movie unless you are a prude or can't handle NON PC type stuff. I give it a 6 instead of higher because some of the acting is bad.

I don't see how you can not laugh at this movie. It is dark humor and if you like that kind of thing you should watch this one

The adoption story and the finger is worth the price alone.

I am not sure why more people did not like this one. I will look for more movies from this writer

So because this movie is basically 5 seperate small movies in one. I decided to rate each indivually and the average of that would be my overall rating for the film.

1.) Green eyed monster- 9/10

This in my opinion was the best by far out of all them. I honestly could've watched full length movie on this. It was very taboo, dramatic, and tension filled. The acting also was done very well by all parties.

2.)This little piggy-7/10

This one had good amount of humor in it and it was while pretty silly and kind of cheesy interesting for the most part.

3.)Buyers Remorse-1/10

This one was by far the worst out of all them. I literally hated it with passion. Dry humor, very disgusting scenes, draggy, and virtually had no payoff in the end.

4.)Kangaroo Court-6/10

This one was okay for the most part. I diddn't enjoy Lake Bell at all (I usually like her in everything else), the kid actors were pretty annoying, but the thing that had me convinced to not give it bad rating was the climax was very wild and something would never saw coming.

5.)Maneater-8/10

I can imagine this final scene must of had tremendous out of controversy and if it was released in 2020. I personally think this movie would got shelved immediately. With that said this scene by far had the best acting. Zoe Saldana was excellent and very believeble. It was wild/unexpected spin on something so very vile that you can't help but look away from the scene.

Overall after averaging these scores on it left me with final score of a 6 out of 10. Which I think is pretty fair for entire movie. Was it masterpiece? No. Will it be massive cult film? Def not. But it is solid watch if its weekend and you have nothing better to do just please make sure you know what you're getting into as this movie isn't for everyone.

Anthology films can be fun when done well, even if a vast majority of the time the good ones have some unevenness. While 'Burning Palms' is not a complete disaster, the disturbing and entertaining moments were too far and between, much of it being in bad taste and not for the easily offended.

The best of the five anthology stories were, for me, "This Little Piggy" and "Maneater". The former being the most entertaining, where the few humorous parts that worked were present (just wished that the ending was better rounded off), and the latter being the creepiest and most compelling. Didn't care for the acting on the whole, but some are decent. Coming off best are a sincere Jamie Chung, an intense and touching Zoe Saldana and a suitably sleazy Nick Stahl. Rosamund Pike doesn't have all that much to do, but brings a sense of urgency and intensity without being melodramatic that makes "Green Eyed Monster" watchable. Some of the music score is used to unsettling effect, not being bombastic, one-note or intrusive, though most of the time it does its job serviceably but with not much distinction.

Sadly, two good segments, a few decent performances and some nice moments musically were far outweighed by the numerous things that didn't work at all. Aside from Pike, "Green Eyed Monster" is forgettable and doesn't really do anything with its incest subject matter. It also suffers from its ending feeling the most incomplete-feeling and anti-climactic of all the five stories, in a film where neither ending feels that well-rounded off. "Kangaroo Court" is similarly not that memorable, and is further let down by a bland atmosphere, a particularly limp pace and very predictable shocks. The worst of the five this viewer found to be "Buyers Remorse" which was an embarrassment, with the film's most cringeworthy dialogue, vicious gay stereotypes galore and even Africans will find the film's depiction of African stereotypes verging on offensive (or even worse offensive full-stop).

Visually, 'Burning Palms' has an unfocused and monochrome visual style that fails to bring any atmosphere of any kind, while there are also too many superfluous shots of people and objects that have nothing to do with the storytelling, seeming only to be there for director Christopher Landon to revel in his cynicism and self-indulgence. Those are also the two words (self-indulgent and cynical that is) that would describe Landon's directing here, am aware that this was his film debut but those characteristics completely take over any tension, pace or suspense Landon could have provided.

'Burning Palms's' script is at best sloppy, only showing spark really in "This Little Piggy". The funny parts are crass and vulgar, with as said the supposed humour in "Buyers Remorse" enough to make even those with a strong stomach cringe. The parts intended to shock, especially in "Kangaroo Court", are timed limply, feel predictable and either too disgustingly crude or too tame with the film never feeling dark enough. The satire is next to non-existent, and if there was any it was nowhere near biting or sharp enough. Whatever points were made about stereotypes and such were done so viciously, especially in "Buyers Remorse" and the film's general treatment of women, that it all felt bigoted and misogynistic.

Generally, the storytelling apart from in two segments doesn't come off that well. Not enough of 'Burning Palms' entertains or disturbs; pacing is slack; the subject matters for all five stories are trivialised and not explored enough being completely lost in the film's content; the five stories as well as ending on anti-climactic notes don't seem related to one another and little attempt is made to tie them together (instead limping from one segment to another); any parts intended to be dark are not dark at all, being too tame and too safe, like the writers were afraid to take the plunge properly and at the end of the day the viewer question what the point of the film was. Nothing is done to make the characters emotionally investable or easy to root for, they are written too blandly and others are downright annoying.

All in all, not unwatchable but generally it didn't entertain and it didn't disturb, or at least not enough. The only thing that was shocking was how distasteful much of the film felt. 3/10 Bethany Cox