Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

I watched this on DVR and had to keep pausing it for sanity breaks. The combination of the long runtime, contrived plot, and painfully slow pacing is just awful. The generally derivative story is boring and disappointing. The character of Helena (Phoebe Waller-Bridge) is very irritating (as many have noted). But the action and pacing *do* pick up in the final act -- it's suddenly an acceptable watch.

I won't spoil it, but there's an unexpected element to the ending that is rather sweet -- I got misty-eyed.

This is essentially an overly-long 3.5-star film conjoined with a short 6.5-star film. I give it five (5) stars overall.

So much negativity ahead of the release considering the role of a certain female support character. Then lots of stories about early reviews being bad to mediocre at best. We went to see it today and honestly, I liked it.. quite a lot! This isn't a story about replacing Indiana Jones with a female character. This is a really good final film and a worthy send off for our beloved adventurer. Don't expect it to be as good as the original three films. Go in with an open mind and realistic expectations, and you'll walk out entertain and humming a famous tune. In the end that's what Indiana Jones movies are all about.

There is no way you can fix the industry and begin producing good movies again if you can still make tens of millions of profit with this bad casting, this bad script, this bad editing and this bad production.

I've always thought that nobody worse than Shia LeBeouf could be cast in this franchise but Phoebe Waller Bridge... Wow!

Sometimes, as a producer, you should finish the product, then watch it and decide not to release it out of self respect.

Even The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull couldn't ruin the legacy for me but Phoebe Waller Bridge managed to do it in 5 minutes.

A young Harrison Ford CGI dubbed by the actual one was just tragic.

With a heavy heart, I think I have to concede that Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny is not good. It's probably even bad, because even the parts that are sort of entertaining ultimately disappoint.

Take for example the prologue with a de-aged Harrison Ford. The technology used to do it is impressive, and only looked awkward in a couple of shots for me. It's Indy adventuring during the end of World War II, and it almost captures the adventure/action you'd want. However, it's so dimly lit that barely anything can be seen. It's probably to disguise the de-aging, but it's disappointing. The stuff you can see isn't particularly great, but it fares better than the next couple of big action scenes.

These are spaced out over the next 80 to 90 minutes. Said 80 to 90-minute stretch is honestly very boring. Harrison Ford is trying, and John Williams' score is pretty good. I usually like Phoebe Waller-Bridge, but her character didn't work for me. Barely any of the humor landed. The action is incredibly dull and quite often poorly shot. Ford himself isn't in much of the action, which is understandable, but it also begs the question of why they even bothered trying to make an action movie with an 80-year-old man.

I swear characters enter a hotel at night, and they come out the front door five minutes later and it's the middle of the day. Why did they bring John Rhys-Davies back without giving him anything to do? Why was Antonio Banderas in this for like, five minutes? Why do they think audiences will care that Banderas and Toby Jones play "friends" of Indiana Jones, even if they've never been seen or mentioned before this film? Why does Hollywood keep wasting Mads Mikkelsen?

The final half-hour is sort of fun, but it concludes very abruptly and awkwardly. Some people will hate where the movie goes regardless, but I thought it came close to giving the whole thing a pulse. The final scene itself sounds like it should work on paper, but it did nothing for me emotionally. As I walked home, I liked the movie less and less, the more I thought about it.

It's so lifeless and uninspired, and even if maybe a third of it is passable, the rest is a combination of boring and baffling. Even if you're a big fan of the series, I wouldn't bother. This is a good deal worse than the other four.

It is 1944 and adventuring archaeologist Indiana Jones is in a familiar predicament: the Nazis have caught him attempting to scupper their nefarious plans. After breaking free of their vile clutches, Jones and his accomplice Basil Shaw discover the fascists have found the Antikythera mechanism, a device created by Archimedes that supposedly reveals time fissures. Jones escapes, foils the enemy's schemes and steals the mechanism- seemingly putting the matter to bed. Some 25 years later, however, Jones is thrust back into action when his goddaughter Helena comes looking for the Antikythera; with an underground group of die-hard Nazis on her tail. Will Jones and Helena manage to save the day before time runs out?

Directed by James Mangold and written alongside Jez Butterworth, John-Henry Butterworth and David Koepp, 'Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny' is an uneven sendoff to one of the greatest characters in film history, that all too often feels like it came from the 'paint by numbers' school of filmmaking. Mangold tries throughout to recapture the magic of the original trilogy of Jones pictures, and occasionally succeeds; such as in the thrilling opening set in 1944, or a touching reunion between Indy and his estranged love at the end of the film. Furthermore, it is consistently enjoyable watching Harrison Ford on screen as Indy once more, even if he is a more downcast fellow this time; and the odd reference to adventures past is sure to make fans of the series grin from ear to ear.

However, the narrative is weak, the characterization of secondary characters is scant at best and- weirdly- at times it seems as if Indy is the sidekick in his own film. Helena Shaw, from the moment she comes on screen, is treated as the real star of the show, despite her being a decidedly unlikable lady. A spoiled and arrogant heiress, she is constantly rude and dismissive of Indy, when she isn't being reckless and impulsive, putting herself and others in danger for her own selfish motives. As written, the character has little to no respect for history or culture, seeing everything as a means to an end. She contrasts starkly with Indy, whose humble respect for his profession and legacy endears him to audiences. Helena, on the other hand, is a self-centered cad, who tries to upstage our hero at every turn. Why Mangold thought she should be made the (arguable) central character when this is Indy's last outing is beyond comprehension, not to mention being irritating and disrespectful to a cinematic legend.

Alas, Mangold's poor characterization isn't confined to her alone. 'Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny' not only provides us with a discount Short Round in the form of Helena's associate Teddy- a kid more irritating than mischievous- but a discount Major Toht too, in the form of Professor Voller- a Nazi scientist so generic even the incomparable Mads Mikkelsen can't make him interesting. Neither of these new iterations of old characters are very compelling, nor well rounded; and their inclusion in the film feels like a desperate attempt to out-do and re-create times gone by. Furthermore, the few familiar faces that occasionally pop up feel shoehorned into the plot, and Voller's troupe of henchmen are bland and forgettable.

Unfortunately, 'Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny' contains underwhelming visuals as well, which look cheap compared to the likes of 'Raiders' or 'The Last Crusade.' Much like with the previous 'The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull', there is a phony digital sheen to everything on screen that takes one out of the movie completely, and the questionable CGI is jarring throughout. Comparing the first three movies with the last two, it seems digital processes don't fit an Indiana Jones vehicle, they are the kind of epics that demand to be shot on film with practical effects. Moreover, the exaggerated effects and artificiality of proceedings hamper whatever realism Mangold was trying to foster with his downbeat narrative and allusions to real world history.

The main problem with 'Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny,' though, is its lack of originality or charm, which the previous films- well, the first three, anyway- had in spades. Mangold seems content to rely on recycled tropes and clichés to forward the story, making this adventure feel like familiar ground instead of fresh fun. The film uses the similar formula of Nazis, ancient artifacts, exotic locations and supernatural elements that we have seen before, but without the wit, creativity and excitement that made them memorable; meaning this iteration of Indy comes as more of a whimper than a bang.

Are there some elements deserving of praise in the film? Of course. Harrison Ford is consistently excellent and engaging as Indy, carrying the adventure squarely on his shoulders with his usual ease and charm. Furthermore, John Williams' epic score is stirring and- though her character is unlikable- Phoebe Waller-Bridge brings a nice blend of snark and enthusiasm to proceedings, sharing a good chemistry with Ford. Had they a better script to work with- and if Mangold's characterization wasn't so one-dimensional- they might have made a memorable duo. Additionally, the action is generally well realized- though tends towards the overblown- and there are moments and batches of dialogue that'll have fans of the series entertained, even if they are a bit few and far between.

However, 'Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny' just isn't great. As an adventure movie, it is too downbeat, and as a final entry in a fantastic series, it is too weak narratively to make much impact. Though it makes for a better overall package than 'The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull,' it's not by much. The character of Helena Shaw is hard to warm to, the villains are forgettable and the visuals are underwhelming. In short, Indy, Ford and the fans deserved a better movie than 'The Dial of Destiny,' a muddled misadventure proving that time waits for no man; not even Indiana Jones.