10 November 2010 | TheLittleSongbird
Didn't suck as badly as the other spoof movies Friedburg and Seltzer have churned out, but it is still pretty lame
I have made no secret of hating the movies of Jason Friedburg and Aaron Seltzer. Their movies to me are poorly structured, poorly written, terribly acted, and just come across as a waste of time. From reading this sentence and my reviews on them you may be wondering why I watched Vampires Suck in the first place. Simple, out of curiosity. I wanted to see whether Friedberg and Seltzer had gotten better or were further losing the plot.
Although I was very unimpressed overall, I have to say it is a slight improvement over their previous efforts. A year ago I would have said Date Movie was their best(very faint praise though) but after seeing Vampires Suck I have changed my mind. This is their best, but it is still barely average.
I will get onto the good things before the many bad things. Now I saw it to see how well or not it poked fun of Twilight. Just for the record, I don't hate the Twilight movies as much as others do, but I have never understood their popularity either. In Vampires Suck, the costume and set design are actually spot on, the previous movies especially Disaster Movie look like straight to video fodder. Also Matt Lanter gives a dead on impression as Edward Sullen, as does Jenn Proske as Becca. Also, while I may sound mean here, I am glad Carmen Electra is not in this, she is the epitome of all looks, no talent to me so I was kind of pleased not to see her grating presence dragging the film down any further.
However, that's where the redeeming qualities end. The story is very disjointed and almost non-existent, while the humour is another let-down. There are a scatter of surprising laughs here and there, but never anything hilarious or anything consistent to make it even funnier. The direction is patchy too, and that is being kind, while the soundtrack while definitely not as bad this time around is forgettable. The two leads are fine, however the other acting is nothing to write home about at all really, nobody else stood out. Pacing is an issue too; admittedly pacing was a big weakness in the Twilight movies as well as the clunky dialogue, but as Vampires Suck was never that funny the pedestrian pacing made the experience somewhat exhausting.
In conclusion, a marginal improvement but it is very faint praise. For me it is still one of the worst movies of 2010. 3/10 Bethany Cox