Weird: The Al Yankovic Story (2022)

Daniel Radcliffe: Weird Al

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Weird Al : I'm living the dream! To have 20,000 people every night singing MY words... to someone else's music... I feel truly alive on that stage.

• Weird Al : You're all just a bunch of normals. I am the Weird one! I am the weird one!

• Weird Al : So, would you like to see the rest of the house?

  Madonna : There's only one room I'm interested in seeing.

  Weird Al : Oh, I'm doing some work on the bathroom. But there's another one downstairs.

  Madonna : Oh, I'm not talking about the bathroom.

  Weird Al : Then let me show you to the laundry room.

  Madonna : Al Yankovic, are you playing with me?

  Weird Al : Yes?

• Weird Al : You don't think things are moving too fast with us, do you?

  Madonna : Baby, don't be silly. We're soul mates. This is true love. When you know, you know.

  Weird Al : You're so right. This has been the happiest six hours of my life.

• Weird Al : [over phone, referring to Nick]  What does he want to tell me?

  Mary : Well, mostly he just wants you to know that he's definitely not proud of you.

  Weird Al : What?

  Mary : Yes. He told me to be crystal clear about that. Also, he still thinks that parody songs are stupid. And I don't have to tell you about how he feels about the accordion, do I?

• Dr. Demento : I think Madonna's a bad influence on you. I think she's an evil, conniving succubus, and she's only using you for her pathetic and selfish needs.

  Weird Al : What?

  Dr. Demento : [to Madonna]  No offense.

• Madonna : Have you heard my new single "like a virgin"?

  Weird Al : Oh, I've heard it. And I'm curious, is that song... autobiographical?

  Madonna : Yes. I technically am a virgin, except for the fact that I've had a lot of sex.

• Weird Al : Pablo Escobar, you just made the biggest mistake of your life.

• Steve : [as Al is about to go on stage at the bar]  The new song's a bonafide hit.

  Weird Al : It's about ice cream!

  Bermuda : Everybody likes ice cream.

  Weird Al : This seems like more a whiskey and heroin crowd.

• [inspired by The Knack's song "My Sharona" while looking at a stack of bologna, Al gets an idea for a new parody song] 

  Weird Al : M-M-M-My bologna... M-M-M-My bologna...

• Tony Scotti : I thought you should hear it from me first. Michael Jackson just released a new single called "Beat It." It's... um... well, it's a parody of Eat it.

  Weird Al : You mean the kid from the Jackson Five? Why is that has-been trying to ride my coattails?

  Tony Scotti : He actually has a pretty successful solo career now.

  Weird Al : Whatever! You're telling me Michael Jackson recorded a parody of my song?

  Tony Scotti : Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Same music, different words.

  Weird Al : What kind of sick freak changes the words to someone else's song? Beat It, huh? Wait, so it's about eggs?

  Tony Scotti : No, no, it's... uh, I don't think it's even about food. It's about fighting? Or trying to avoid a fight? I'm not exactly sure.

  Weird Al : What gives him the right? Can he even do this?

  Tony Scotti : I think you're overreacting just a little, OK? I mean, this could be great publicity. Sell a few more albums...

  Weird Al : No, I don't need to sell more albums, Tony! I need people to start taking me seriously that creates original music. Now some idiots will probably get confused and think Beat It came first!

  Tony Scotti : Nobody's gonna think that.

• John Deacon : We're playing a little gig next week called Live Aid. I'd be honored if you'd join the band and play that song on stage with us. What do you say?

  Weird Al : Hard pass!

• Madonna : So it's true what they're saying? You're not doing parodies anymore?

  Weird Al : My song Eat It which, as you know, is a hundred percent original, is the biggest hit by anybody ever. So, I've decided that's all I want to do from now on. Completely original songs.

• Madonna : You just killed Pablo Escobar!

  Weird Al : I know! I've killed so many people this week! Before last Thursday, I never really killed anyone.