Plot

Hank and Aaron are low on attendees at their Alien Abductees Anonymous Of America meetings. Hank started AAAA because his girlfriend claims to be an abductee. Hank puts her in a room with other "abductees" to bring her to her senses.

Late one night, after an AAAA meeting, the shy, sensitive Aaron finds a 4-foot alien "puppet" on a downtown Portland river dock and takes it home. Hank figures they can boost attendance by advertising a "mystery guest" and then making people think it's real. The plan backfires, however, when people boo and walk out. As they leave, the alien comes alive. Aaron is so startled, he hits his head, loses consciousness and has a "conversion" experience, leading him to believe he is meant for a "higher purpose." Crystal just thinks he needs a girlfriend, and suggests to roommate Alladora that she take up the cause. Instead, Alladora asks for "Brad's number." Brad is Crystal's fall back ex-boyfriend no one has ever seen. Crystal and Hank dance around each other, just short of commitment. She's not sure he's true to her, he's not sure she's over Brad. Crystal is ecstatic when Angel, the alien, communicates with her by telepathy. But later she's horrified to learn that Hank is trying to sell Angel on the Internet. She steals Angel, determined to introduce Angel and the "truth about UFOs" to the world. The world, however, is full of government agents, reporters, UFO experts and "alien" agents, all with their own personal agendas. With everybody after her, Crystal decides the world isn't ready for Angel, and returns to the barn where she and Hank made love in the hay, and where she had her UFO abduction experience...after Hank fell asleep.—Anonymous