Lollipop Monster (2011)

  |  Drama


Lollipop Monster (2011) Poster

Ari and Oona. Two 15-year-old girls, two dysfunctional families. Absolute opposites and yet somehow similar. No one listens, no one hears. Ari feels she is misunderstood and compensates for... See full summary »

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6.5/10
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12 February 2015 | chow913
3
| Lolita and Death Take a Holliday
FYI, although IMDb states both girls are "15," their ages are in fact never mentioned, but it is made clear Oona is older and not in the same grade as Ari, and it's suggested Oona is a high school senior while Ari is a freshman. Once again IMDb can't get their facts straight.

Oona is the teenage daughter of two Beatnik artists. Beatnik artists in Germany? The heck you say?

Their life is summed up in one single line, "Mum's fxxxing your brother in the car." Yup, mom's having an affair with Uncle Lukas (?) I couldn't follow the names here, it was poorly subtitled-- and she isn't making any apologies for it. Oona starts cutting. (herself)

Ari is a dead ringer for Sue Lyon in 'Lolita,' this was probably intentional. Her nuclear family of four is pretty perfect except for the fact that her older brother has mental problems of imaginary illnesses.

The contrast in sets is almost laughably overdone. Oona's art studio apartment looks like Kevin Spacey's apartment in 'Se7en' and Ari's looks like Pee Wee's playhouse. I'm not exaggerating.

The two opposites predictably become friends... why? Their eyes both glow like cats' when they look at each other. Again, not exaggerating. This is the only explanation we get.

One day on the playground all the school kids rush to see a dead man hanging from a tree. Yup, it's Oona's father.

Ari rebels against her ordinary life in two ways. One, by painting her room from pink to black while watching a music video 'Goodbye Barbie' (on a tube antenna TV). And second by screwing everyone in sight.

She starts with the school lecher whom tries to pick up school girls on their way to school. So this is the key to picking up hot blondes? Stalk school playgrounds? When I tried it all I got was a restraining order.

Ari even does her brother's black American girlfriend, and then predictably Uncle Lukas.

The film ends with Ari inviting Lukas over for sex at her house only so Oona can beat him to death with a fireplace poker. The girls make no attempt to hide their murder. Their parents just find the body in the living room and casually cover it all up without a spoken word. Presumably they don't want their daughter to go to jail and presumably Ari and Oona just automatically know this.

In conclusion, I watched very carefully for any sign of a lollypop and never saw a single one. The film is pretty predictable and boring. The murder is just tacked on to the last 5 minutes of the film for something to happen. There are no scenes of the girls plotting the murder or even talking about how much they hate Lukas.

Three stars for Ari's sex appeal. That's the only entertainment value this film has.

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