10 April 2013 | Kolobos51
Like watching a hard-R Lifetime movie.
Girls Against Boys is not a good film. It's also nothing like what you might expect from the current promotional art, which suggests it's some sort of cross between Kill Bill and I Spit on Your Grave. Instead, this is a cheesy, man-hating melodrama about a nice normal girl that snaps after hitting a really bad patch of luck all because of, you guessed, those evil, penis wielding creatures known as MEN.
Scream queen Danielle Panabaker (Friday the 13th and The Crazies remakes) stars as a meek, naive college girl immersed in a boneheaded affair with a middle-aged married man (Andrew Howard of Hatfields and McCoys and the I Spit on Your Grave remake). Him dumping her right before he was supposed to take her on a dream vacation to Aspen is bad enough, but then, while out getting trashed to forget the breakup, she is raped by a douche bag pretty boy (Michael Stahl-David of Cloverfield).
The cops, all men, obviously, are insensitive jerks that act like a rape is a minor misdemeanor but wait, she has luckily just made a new BFF, a psychotically anti-male lesbian played by Nicole LaLiberte. They go on a killing spree that involves murder of random guys that never did anything to them and torture of guys that did.
That's about it. The first half of the movie, which is all setting up Panabaker's hatred of men, is painfully slow not to mention silly and contrived. The second half becomes dramatically more violent and, consequently, more fast paced. I'll also point out that the production values and performances from the cast are solid. It's not enough to save the movie, though.
Theoretically, this could be described as a rape/revenge film in the tradition of Ms. 45, They Call Her One Eye, or even I Spit on Your Grave only made for female audiences and that would be okay if it weren't so thin and dull. Instead, Girls Against Boys feels like Thelma and Louise if it were more violent and made by less talented people.