Giovanni Francesco: Jack

Quotes 

• Jack : Please tell me you're not buying those lines.

  Abby : Buying what?

  Jack : Those lines he used on you.

  Abby : What lines?

  Jack : [in Spanish accent]  "You're stunning?" "Really sunning?"

  Abby : No Jack, maybe he thought I really was stunning? Maybe it wasen't just some line.

  Jack : Oh, those were lines.

  Abby : Oh, God.

  Jack : And the sad thing about it is, you believed him.

  Abby : Not every guy in the entire world is an asshole, Jack.

  Jack : Yeah. But he could be a serial killer.

  Abby : Ugh! He's *not* a serial killer!

• Jack : [Abby is checking herself out in the mirror]  Matching couples. Purple. How cute. So where'd you meet this guy?

  Abby : Hot yoga. What do you care?

  Jack : Hot yoga?

  Abby : Yeah.

  Jack : You like flexible guys, huh?

  Abby : Mm-hm.

  Jack : Let me guess how this all went down. So you're dripping sweat all over you're yoga mat. You're wearing these skin-tight spandex. You're doing that thing where you hook your ankles behind your neck, so he slides over, and he thinks you're this really nice girl that he'd he'd just love to get know. What happened to meeting guys the old-fashioned way, like at a bar or something?

  Abby : I met *you* at a bar! And look how that turned out! Now move. You know, it's amazing, you're supposed to be this expert on women,and yet, you're an asshole ninety-nine percent of the time.

  Jack : Yeah. But it's that one percent that keeps you coming back for more.

  Abby : Goodnight, Jack.