Pierre Coffin: The Minions

Minions

The Minions

Scarlett Overkill: DO you know who this is?
[points at a British Royal portrait]
Kevin the Minion: Uh... la cucaracha?
Scarlett Overkill: This is Queen Elizabeth! And I really, really, really want her crown!

[from trailer]
Herb Overkill: Woah! These guys are pumped!
Scarlett Overkill: Maybe I'll settle them down with a bedtime story.
Bob the Minion: Bedtime story?
Scarlett Overkill: Once upon a time, there were three little pigs. The pigs encountered a big, bad wolf, who hired the three pigs to come work for her. One day, the pigs did something very stupid, so the wolf huffed, and puffed and she BLEW THEM OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH! The end.

[from trailer]
Kevin the Minion: Ah, hehehehe.
Stuart the Minion: [backs off Kevin] No no no no, Kevin, let me do it, let me do it, spita.
[holds up his hand, tries to get the tar truck to stop, but fails and falls back]
Kevin the Minion: [laughs]
[mockingly]
Kevin the Minion: No no no no, let me do it, let me do it, spita!
Stuart the Minion: Macao.
[lifts up rock]
Stuart the Minion: Mackaro!
[throws it and lays on it unhappily]
Kevin the Minion: [gets his cardboard sign ready, a car is honking and stops]
Bob the Minion: NO!
[coughing]
Kevin the Minion: [nervously holds up sign reading "Orlando"]
Madge Nelson: [opens car door and takes off her sunglasses] Oh Walter, look, these adorable little freaks are headed to Orlando too!

Walter Nelson: You're going to Villain-Con, aren't ya?
Bob the Minion: Villain-Con!
Tina: [shows Kevin her magazine] I'm going to get all of my favorite villains to sign my magazine! Scarlet Overkill! If I was a minion, that's who'd I want to work for!

Tower Guard: So... You came for the queen's crown, did ya? Well, you're gonna have to get through me! The keeper of her crown!
[Kevin, Stuart and Bob laugh, because the tower guard is in the wrong direction]
Kevin the Minion: [mockingly] "You're gonna have to get through me!"
[gets hit in the head by a cane]
Kevin the Minion: Ow, hey!
Tower Guard: You!
[hits Kevin right between his legs with his cane]
Kevin the Minion: Aaaaahhhhh! Huh? Hehe.

[after growing into a giant by one of Herb's inventions, destroying the Overkill residence while the villains from Villain-Con watch]
Kevin the Minion: [loud booming voice] Bello.

Scarlett Overkill: [opens the door to the torture room for Kevin, Stuart, and Bob] Go ahead, go ahead.
[the Minions walk in as Scarlett slams the door]
Scarlett Overkill: [Minions look at the torture weapons]
Scarlett Overkill: [through a slot hole in the door] I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but I hate you. I thought I could get over what you did, but I feel so betrayed.
[dramatic]
Scarlett Overkill: I think, yes, I think we're gonna have to break up. And it's not you... oh, wait hold on... It is you. It's a hundred percent you!
Kevin the Minion: No, no, no, no!
[Stuart and Bob latch onto him]
Scarlett Overkill: [taunting] So get comfortable, Minions. Get real, real comfortable. Because this is where you're going to spend the rest of you worthless, little lives.
[slams the slot]

Scarlett Overkill: [after giant Kevin has saved Stuart and Bob] So that's your plan? Make yourself a BIGGER target?
[starts blasting at Kevin with her Lava Lamp guns]
Kevin the Minion: AHHH!
[runs away]