The Zero Theorem

I like pondering things. I like science fiction, philosophical themes, surreal and abstract. This movie is all of those, and considering it's a Gilliam/Waltz collaboration, I had to see it.

It was a mess. Many people probably insist that it was intended and that's the genius of it, but even if that was true, it was one mess I didn't enjoy.

The whole time I had a feeling that "Zero Theorem" was meant to be a weird play. I could almost see an amateur playwright taking some drugs, and then writing a quirky existential story set in a bizarro world mirroring ours, typing every single thing that comes to his mind in one night. Then Gilliam comes along, takes said drugs himself, reads the play and says: "I want to make a movie out of this".

Everything is quirky, in-your-face, colourful and tries to make a point. Every single sentence of a dialogue, every single character, every single weird costume, every single stage prop is either attention-grabbing nonsense, social commentary or an allegory. It gets tiring, and it doesn't take long when you know that this movie doesn't have any focus - it just throws things at you.

Waltz is wasted. He isn't that bad altogether, but there's no way for him to be in a character in a movie like this, where he has no character. Yes, we're told that he doesn't like to touch people and he's looking for the meaning of his life, but he eventually has to be whatever the scene is telling him to be - usually just someone people are talking to or acting upon him. He's almost an object. You can't get a grip of his character - and neither can Waltz, and it's not his fault at all. This is true of every other character as well, except beautiful Melanie Thierry. She does a good job and comes off as a real character in the end - and she is the only one. Perhaps David Thewlis has a few good moments too.

Much of the beautiful main set - interior of a chapel - is wasted too. It's atmospheric, well lit and obviously a fitting choice thematically, but soon it turns into a weird sitcom set where people just come in and out, spouting all kinds of crappy dialogue and bringing pizza.

The themes are wasted, because they're everywhere. They're hitting you on the head, on your face, on your chest, on your throat, on your arms - all the time. The themes, symbols and allegories are plentiful, but it all ends up eating itself. Again, many say that this is exactly what Gilliam intended because the movie is about finding a meaning to one's life in the midst of chaos and separation.

The script has loads of unnecessary moments in it, and I fail to see why this movie was made like this. This should've been a short film, 30 minutes tops.

But I give it one thing: Yes, it got me to think. It got me to think of existence, meaningless work, God, loneliness in crowds, disconnection from human touch, government control and surveillance and every bit of reference to the human condition and the world we live in. That's why I bothered to write this review in the first place. I can't say it's pure crap, because it isn't and I do love the fact that these kinds of movies are still made, but a mess is mess. Some messes can be charming, this mess was just messy and I wanted someone to come and clean it up.

For what it's worth, my friend who watched it with me, liked it. He's the smarter one.