A groom en route to his wedding experiences car trouble and encounters a diverse array of folks while trying to get to the church on time.A groom en route to his wedding experiences car trouble and encounters a diverse array of folks while trying to get to the church on time.A groom en route to his wedding experiences car trouble and encounters a diverse array of folks while trying to get to the church on time.
Back-of-an-envelope script has a guy on his wedding day, sort-of-comically getting waylaid repeatedly and laid repeatedly when he should be preparing for the nuptials. That's the entire film, but it becomes overlong at 79 tedious minutes by inclusion of extraneous material.
I was reminded of my practice in the '70s as a 16mm film collector of getting occasional odd reels from my supplier - fragments of unknown films. Sometimes they would be upside down or inside out on the reel, requiring one or two rewinds to make them playable. The game was to try and identify what feature or TV show they emanated from -often fruitless for extremely obscure stuff but fun nonetheless.
In MARRIAGE about half-way through the movie there appear long sequences with a different cast that have nothing to do with the surrounding story or incidents whatsoever. At first I jumped to the conclusion that perhaps at the exhibition level or DVD company stage, separate movies had been spliced together, but more likely the filmmakers merely padded the running time by shooting or recycling their own extra material.
Opening scene has the engaged couple engaged in sex, and sets the movie's style: emphasis on extreme gynecological closeups (leading to a facial in this one instance) and frequently featuring a gimmick of panning away from the action to a blank wall, ceiling or outside towards the shrubbery to mask the cut to next shot in a scene.
Hero's VW beetle breaks down and a female plumper passer-by seduces him, so they make love on a handy blanket outside.
A friendly slacker then offers to buy the bug for $200 but when our hero goes home with him to get the cash, the dude gets waylaid by his wife for some sex, leaving the hapless protagonist standing around outside. Like the previous scene there is no money shot, and the film really gets sloppy at this point - dude leaves for no reason, hero goes upstairs for money and finishes off the guy's wife but again no cum shot.
An unattractive neighbor then seduces the hero, deep throats him skilfully, but he runs off leaving her unsatisfied, again no ejaculation.
Next two sex scenes take place in the woods, with no story and no relation to what's gone before. Very cute and short Fran Spector from FIRES DOWN BELOW is recognizable in a foursome and lesbian sex is also included.
After the camera tilts skyward we finally return to the main film for the final reel, as our hero gets a ride hitchhiking but despite his pleas of being hours late for his own wedding, the couple of benefactors insist on giving him beer and humping in their truck. The stress on how wonderful beer is during this sequence is mystifying, unless the retards who made this movie thought they could audition for being hired to do Miller or Bud commercials down the line.
Hero finally splits and goes home where he meets his blonde future sister-in-law (played by Diane, with big breasts). She bawls him out but seduces him. He decides not to marry her sister Penny after all, choosing the blonde instead.
- Apr 28, 2015