She-Hulk XXX: An Axel Braun Parody (2013)

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19 November 2016 | lor_
A double rip-off
My least favorite pornographers Braun & Cross/Pryor teamed up for this worthless junker, automatically a rip-off by stealing from the Marvel Universe by way of Adult Entertainment's usual free-speech gimmick. Surprise is that it is also an audience rip-off, giving zero value.

Released on 2 DVDs in the industry's deceptive practice of pretending to give the viewer extras (and usually charge extra for the privilege), the second DVD offers an asinine 12-minute "no sex" cut of the feature, trailers and one of the worst BTS short subjects ever. It's 4-minutes long showing makeup ladies applying green "She-Hulk" coating to star Chyna's body. We get to see her coated breasts and nipples, yet despite this effort in the full-length feature she never removes her costume, only showing her pussy via a cutout in the wardrobe.

Terrible dialog is delivered awkwardly by the cast, talented performers who evidently lapsed in their professionalism for this outing, realizing they were trapped in a clunker. I love Gracie Glam but she is ill-used here as She-Hulk's alter ego, and Richie Calhoun pops up as her cousin Bruce Banner in a non-sex role to deliver dumb exposition. No structure to the film is evident, with scenes following one another almost randomly, as if they forgot to shoot any transitions. SPFX are brief and poorly done, with precious little action -something Marvel would never be guilty of.

The great Euro Porn star Jennifer Dark steals the spotlight as bad guy Madame Hydra, but is given little to do but hump. Film ends abruptly with Eric Masterson as Hawkeye depositing his money shot on Chyna.

Would that all copies were sent to a landfill, my own included.

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Release Date:

2 April 2013



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