The Masseuse 3

Sweet Sinner has learned that massage is sure-fire porn material: SEE for example Mimi Rogers in the classic cable soft-core FULL BODY MASSAGE by Nic Roeg, Sarah Young's classic 1992 session at the hands of Sean Michaels in THE GOLDEN GIRL series or more recent epics. Unfortunately this third time at bat for director James Avalon is pure boredom.

I've found other entries in this series arousing, but was hard-pressed (no pun intended, believe me) to make it through this epic-length yet uneventful opus at a single viewing. Warhol's early classics like SLEEP and EMPIRE are too similar for comfort.

Nominal story hook is Dana DeArmond running a massage parlor, where newbie masseuse Jessie Andrews arrives late for work. For the next 160 minutes or so we are treated to ridiculously attenuated massages (in which it's real, innocent massaging of weary limbs and torso) followed inevitably by routine XXX humping with penetration.

The tease factor often works well in these porn exercises (see Mimi Rogers and Sarah Young as proof), but for this video I felt like I'd need Malcolm McDowell's eye-toothpicks from A CLOCKWOrK OrANGE to keep from nodding off.

Opening segment has Dana servicing her regular customer Marcus London on the massage table. She pronounced his name like Larkin of Larkahm but I guess she meant London since the actors use their stage names as the fictional characters' names in these videos. The sex is routine -Dana has been much better in other shows.

We learn that London is a history professor at a community college coincidentally attended by Jessie, who briefly bumps into him at the parlor. He's a single dad with a college age daughter.

It's wholly predictable that his daughter turns out to be friends with Jessie so inevitably, the video will poach on "My Daughter's Best Friend" territory. Before that occurs, Jessie gives Tommy Gunn a massage and what seems like hours later segues to humping him.

The daughter Riley Reid gets a non-professional massage from her young boyfriend Erik Everhard, and this is likely the video's highlight -she's an expressive young performer and has acquitted herself arousingly up against such superstars as Mandingo.

After Erik shoots on her belly, Riley's dad is ready to consummate his lust with Jessie, showing up for a massage appointment and getting so much more. But in this case more is less, as the hermetic setting and unthrilling cast can't keep it up for a running time worthy of LAWRENCE OF ARABIA.

Jessie Andrews is good looking, but strictly ordinary: a slim figure, no memorable features and a deep-throat ability that has become a dime a dozen. To rest this overlong video on her shoulders is unfair, and the viewer is short-changed as well.