Yoga Hosers (2016)

PG-13   |    |  Action, Comedy, Fantasy

Yoga Hosers (2016) Poster

Two teenage yoga enthusiasts team up with a legendary man-hunter to battle with an ancient evil presence that is threatening their major party plans.

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  • Tyler Posey at an event for Yoga Hosers (2016)
  • Kevin Smith and Lily-Rose Depp in Yoga Hosers (2016)
  • Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes at an event for Yoga Hosers (2016)
  • Harley Quinn Smith and Lily-Rose Depp in Yoga Hosers (2016)
  • Tyler Posey and Lily-Rose Depp in Yoga Hosers (2016)
  • Ashley Greene and Jack Depp in Yoga Hosers (2016)

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20 November 2017 | Java_Joe
| Even comedies need some realism.
Kevin Smith was good filmmaker. He made Clerks on a shoestring budget. He made the wickedly funny Dogma. And he made the surreal Tusk. But somewhere along the lines he seems to have forgotten certain things.

While Sophia Coppola wrote a love letter to Japan in "Lost in Translation", Kevin Smith seems to have scrawled something on a bar napkin for Canada in "Yoga Hosers". It's frankly a wonder why specifically this movie was made.

The story itself, is unremarkable. Two girls, played by the daughters of Johnny Depp and Kevin Smith play the two Colleens who wind up in the middle of some really strange stuff dealing with Nazi sausages. Yes that's right, Bratzis. The girls are cute but they're not great actresses. You really need more if you plan on building a career for these two.

But that's not the problem. The problem is why specifically is this set in Canada? Put it in the United States and the story would barely change. The only difference is there wouldn't be all those lame Canadian "jokes" that people say when trying to be clever.

Yes. We get it. Canadians have an accent. They say "sorry" differently. They say "zed" instead of "zee". And nobody, especially in Manitoba, says "aboot". Maybe that's an East coast thing but I've spent time in Canada and never heard anybody say it that yes. Sure, it's different than how we say it in the United States but it's not "aboot".

But literally that's the joke. Canadians talk funny. Ha ha ha. Get it? If not it's okay, it'll only be hammered home with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. If you make the mistake of trying to take a shot every time somebody says "sorry" or "aboot" you'll be passed out in the first 10 minutes.

I'll admit it had some decent moments but overall, it was just terrible.

I'm really not looking forward to "Moose Jaws" because I honestly think it's just going to be more of the same.

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