Fresh Faced Fuckers (2009)

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30 June 2016 | lor_
A couple of points for title alliteration; that's about all
Dick Bush is among the best of Brit Porn's current directors, and most likely to graduate to mainstream assignments some day. But this early effort, for which his partner in crime producer Hazzan B'Gunne hogs the director credit, is crap.

It's either a faux film or cutting room floor material masquerading as a feature -the difference between the two is immaterial. What we get is five auditions by girls smitten with the "f*ck for pay" bug plus some extras of other girls who didn't make the cut. Shay Hendrix, a bona fide British porn actress, is dumped among the also- rans, maybe for spite?

Casting couches aside (they are irrelevant in such an exercise, sort of like asking the metaphysical question: Did Randy West hump those up & comers as price of their admission into the industry or did he call said humping work back in the '90s?), this mindless series of interviews, disrobing and then sex is just as boring as vegetating in front of the Boob Tube watching so-called Reality-TV. The girls' enthusiasm is misplaced -they're being sold a bill of goods by Hazzan & Bush. The viewer's time is being wasted - vintage screen tests (how about Bette Davis trying out for "Gone with the Wind" by George Cukor?) are infinitely better without the dirty bits.

Of the girls spotlighted, familiar stars include Syren Sexton and Alexa Andreas show up, while a very well-built blonde turned out to be a flop in the biz.

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