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  • Title is appropriate, as I got suckered in to trying out several of these horrendous British wimp-porn videos from a family of "really not useful" labels including Fake Taxi, Massage Rooms and Dane Jones. They are mainly a 21st Century mash-up of our Depression Era & post-war WPA & Marshall Plan -putting Eastern European porn talent to work grinding out pointless product.

    Dido Angel, credited on DVD liner as just Dido, is the only credit listed anywhere by these anonymous pornographers, clearly ashamed of their work. It's pantomime, low-energy humping for the video camera, professionally lit, but that's about it. So the actors are rounded up, spend time in makeup and told to go to it in bed, but it takes more than that to earn eyeballs in such a media and let's face it, porn overloaded modern world.

    For the record, the five vignettes here have moderately attractive femmes, probably Czech although there is no dialog, humping away with each other or guys with big-dicks. Decor and color grading is as bland as possible with nothing to distract or hold one's interest, unless generic depiction of explicit sex is a novelty.

    Other than those old stand-bys of tax-shelter or money-laundering or maybe blocked funds (Pepsi in Eastern Europe comes to mind), it boggles my mind why original productions like this are made and marketed -I can understand the endless array of compilations where existing footage is cheaply recycled at minimal cost. At any rate, caveat emptor, baby!