3 July 2018 | lor_
Dumb, repetitive premise produces weak results
Brit Porn has many local peculiarities, that don't travel well. This obscure Pornostatic series from Killergram and DiSanto is a prime example.
Title refers to the annoyingly stupid talisman: each scene begins with an actress pretending to be underage, lollypop in mouth and bouncing around on an inflated pink hopping toy animal. One or two studs hump her, and eventually money shots are delivered.
It that is considered entertaining or erotic, then DiSanto has succeeded in his task. Not for me at least. His casting has a couple of familiar Brit Porn faces but some really low-level femmes who could stump nearly any fan or expert. Final segment stars Tina Marie, not the ethnic superstar of the '80s VCR era back here in the States but a blank-expression youngster who should have remained nameless.
DiSanto has his girls staring relentlessly at the camera for over two hours, while the studs' faces are cropped out of frame except for fleeting moments. I was able to recognized a couple of them, his familiar Andy Mann and Stefan Hard from his "The Handy Man" series, and of course Alonso Shaft's huge black shaft is unmistakable in the Tina Marie scene.