There's a moment in your past that has affected, the way you interface and stay connected, and it's taken quite a tangent, it involves a bottle of scent, but that's what makes you stand tall, fully erected. It starts with replication of that moment, when your world turned upside down with flooded torment, and you've found another soul, she is the south to your north pole, you couldn't hope for a more invested, proponent. But the path to your salvation is not easy, and it may make the odd folk a little queasy, it might take your breath away, there may be plier-work at play, and to some, it may be thought of as, quite sleazy.
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Xstal5 September 2023
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Tweetienator27 March 2020Great movie for the connoisseur of the unusual and odd. If the story sounds interesting and appealing to you - watch, if not, do not bother. Anyway, I enjoyed watching Dogs Don't Wear Pants a lot - remarkable and strong are the performances by Pekka Strang and Krista Kosonen - without that fine acting, the story would look awkward, ridiculous and just fall apart.
Final words: in these times, where card-box characters and stories flood our screens en masse, an indeed exceptional delicious piece - if you like something different to watch. -
IdaBarracuda3 September 2021I had a hunch that the only criticism one might read about this movie is about the "BDSM culture" and how this movie fails to portray it. It's as much about BDSM culture as Lolita is about pedophilia - newsflash, it's not about it. It's also not a documentary. It's art. Chill out.
That being said. The movie is very minimal and I personally loved it. Almost every frame has a meaning and it's not a movie to casually eyeball over. The duet of Krista Kosonen and Pekka Strang is magnificent. Great film making and acting over here, I truly appreciate it.
So if you're interested in some nordic noir, some scandinavian weirdness, the poster and the name tickles you... give this film a chance. -
Finnish movies aren't very well received abroad. One can think of a reason of them being too ordinary. This film is anything but ordinary by Finnish standards and it had hard time getting funding from the film commission.
The main character suffers a great loss and desperately wants to keep his lost loved one close to him.
Story is intriguing but the film itself lacks depth. I'd have enjoyed it a lot more if the characters had been more developed and more time, like first twenty minutes would have been used to tell the family's story before the unfortunate accident. Now bypassing briefly and leaving the background story and suffering to the behind, the film subsides into being just a numbing showcase of Bdsm fetishes. I found myself laughing at it many times and it was very entertaining but not in the way the creators intended it to be.
It's certainly not a film to everyone's taste and it's not a masterpiece either. It's a shame that it's so mediocre because it could have been something. -
pisces-3733031 December 2020I had no idea what to expect going into this. I saw this on Shudder and expected a horror flick, maybe a dominatrix who brutally abuses or dismembers men who abused her in the past. I was wrong, happily so. This was not a horror movie, this was a love story... sort of. It's worth a watch.
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dan_c_ro26 December 2020Those who think that this movie is about sex or fetishes they are wrong. It is about loss and coping with loss. People in general deal with loss in different ways. Some start to drink, some start to take drugs, some start to harm themselves and some get into kink and sadomaso world. It is a way to deal with your feelings and pain. Go see this movie with an open mind and heart.
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"What takes the lion's share of the story is Juha's drab life, his home is as antiseptic as his working place, the communication between him and Elli is occluded, he prefers a BDSM session over Elli's band performance in the school, which says a lot about what a parent he is, and we aren't informed if his wife's decease is an accident or not, is there marital strife in the play? Meanwhile, the fascinating Mona is utilized solely as an enigma, is playing dominatrix a side hustle for fast cash or stems from her id? It could be both but the answer is moot. Again, there is no pleasure in their role play, Juha only wants to experience the feeling of suffocation to re-live that drowning tragedy, to meet his dead wife again, underwater and breathless, not the frisson of ASMR or orgasm. And a po-faced Mona is a pro doing her routines with as less emotional attachment as possible, she doesn't seem to enjoy what she does, not for a minute, if anything, only some unspecified disturbance are looming beneath her spandex get-up. So, if the story sounds perversely erotic, Valeapää's execution is rather somber, un-sexy and queasy (fingernail-pulling and tooth-pulling are far from the nexus of BDSM), and when Mona's professional facade predictably cracks, we are not any the wiser."
read my full review on my blog: Cinema Omnivore, thanks. -
hankychan3 October 2019I blind bought a ticket for this because of the amazing poster and interesting name, that was an amazing decision.
It's an odd, beautiful and hilarious story, presented with insane talent. This director is exceptional, every frame is beautiful and interesting. The film is very low on dialogue which lets the director show how amazing he is at visual storytelling.
Apparently people walked out of this? It has some hard to watch bodily harm scenes but to be honest it's really not that bad. No one in my screening walked out.
If this director keeps up this quality he is going to be hailed as a master in 50 years -
IWasKnownAsThe1SentenceReviewer21 February 2022I was expecting watching the story of a man's broken life turning for the better when meeting his dominatrix, but it felt more to me like the story of a broken man even more shattered by this encounter: weirdly interesting and interestingly weird.
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torrascotia6 February 2021There are a few films which try to deal with this type of lifestyle and none so far seem to have grasped the basics. This is no exception.
The story follows a rather one dimensional surgeon who loses his wife to a drowning accident which almost claims his life as well. The story then fast forwards to the surgeon and his now teenage daughter attending her tongue piercing.
After being throw out of the piercing studio he stumbles into a BDSM dungeon and is attacked and choked semi-conscious by a dominatrix.
During this loss of consciousness he is able to reconnect with his dead wife. The remaining story is him and his experiences of seeing the same dominatrix in order to lose consciousness and her resistance to his goals.
There are quite a number of obvious issues with this particular movie. First off, there is no conversation about the sessions which makes no sense at all.
He basically turns up with a vague notion of seeing this woman and there is nothing discussed as to what these sessions are to be about.Seeing as these can cost literally hundreds of I am guessing Euros per hour its quite unbelievable someone would go through this without very good reason and specific ideas of their wants.
Contrary to what some believe its the client who makes the demands, is in control and sets the terms etc.
So this movie falls at the first hurdle in terms of reality as its the woman who seems to be dictating the sessions for her own enjoyment, not the paying customer.
Any straying outside of what was clearly agreed upon by both parties would be seen as abusive and the scene terminated.
Cliche number two is that the male gets so overwhelmed by whatever is going on that he risks his job and puts his pleasure before his child.
While the third cliche is that anyone involved in this lifestyle enjoys dancing to really bad electronic music in nightclubs filled with naked old men.
And the final one is that the man would get away with breaking social boundaries with the woman and he will eventually win her as a partner in the end.
The narrative has far too many holes to be realistic however these are basically middle class movies made in Europe for people who think they are smarter than average people because they watch stuff with subtitles.
The film itself is pretty bland and boring with lots of slow motion shots, dark rooms lit by neon and flashbacks.
The acting is particularly wooden and nobody has anything interesting to say. While I get some Euro countries people are reserved there is no life in anyone in this movie. People simply move about like drones and there are no interesting relationships at all.
Basically its hard to care about or like anyone in this and the BDSM scenes make no sense and the relationship is simply not believable.
Nor does it "shed light" on these lifestyles because it gets the basics of the relationship dynamic completely wrong.
I am sure a few art school students will think they are "worldly" after watching this but its neither engaging or entertaining. -
beeboprocksteady-0744018 March 2020You sometimes hear people say things like 'film is dead '- and with all the straight to Netflix drivel that's out there, their argument could be made. This is the type of artwork that counters that debate and flat out obliterates it. Every frame of this movie communicates something beautiful. Every moment does the same. And that is to say, beauty in this case means a slice of life that is heightened and made all the more visceral and real. This is a true 'underdog' story...pardon the pun, but it's about someone who experiences the lowest of lows, and is smacked in the face (literally) with a second chance at love. This films shows that no, the world practically NEVER works out the way we want it, but if we are open to new things, we can not only survive, but also THRIVE. This movie made me cry tears of joy at the end. It's the weird love story that we need right now in this loony world.
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karenwright-6737214 February 2021It's an ok film. Clearly the person who had written the script had a poor dark view of bdsm. The client didn't know what to expect when he arrived, she just went straight to it and done something he didn't like, they must not have discussed anything prior. He didn't even know he should have removed his clothing. When the scene finished he was shaking and crying, a Domme should always give aftercare, granted it is fantasy. Please do not take this seriously if you are wanting to look into bdsm a good Domme would not act like this.
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youngcollind29 April 2021Minimal in concept and execution. Not reaching for the stars, but not missing them. Lightly disturbing throughout, basically satisfying finish. Worth your time.
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akornjezebel4 July 2021If you enjoy quirky, dark, comedic, adult themed movies its worth watching.
If you're a lover of mainstream media you should probably avoid this movie. You won't truly understand it and it'll probably shock you somewhat.
Ddwp I would say is a dark comedy that briefly introduces the viewer to the realms of bdsm (hate the term but hey ho). If you're into genuine bdsm play you'll spot all the obvious mistakes in the film and laugh at a few scenes because of how inaccurate they are, but this I think is done on purpose and to keep the pace of the film up. So bar the inaccuracies it's well worth a watch.
The protagonist is having trouble grieving the death of his wife and through a very strange twist of fate ends up meeting a dominatrix and from that point on the roller-coaster ride begins. The movie ends with, I think, the two realising they may actually have a future together. The in-between parts of the movie are dark and often funny albeit a little twisted. -
paullow-608438 October 2019Hard hitting at times and at other times utterly hilarious. Dialogue was kept quite minimal which I enjoyed considering it was subtitled, but this just highlighted how good the camera work was. Please go and watch thus movie!
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Blue-Grotto25 July 2020Dogs Don't Wear Pants (Finland, J.P. Valkeapaa, 2019) - "It is by going down into the abyss," said Joseph Campbell "that we recover the treasures of life."
A surgeon, Juha, sinks into depression after his wife drowns. Neglecting his job, daughter and health, Juha is breaking down. When he stumbles into the orbit of Mona, a dominatrix, she becomes an obsession for him. Through her there are flashbacks to moments with his wife. Juha cannot get enough. Mona too is infatuated. Here is someone impervious to her charms. As they push each other deeper, someone has got to blink.
The radiance of Dogs Don't Wear Pants is the focus on the characters of both Mona and Juha, not one or the other. Also, it is deep and enlightening in ways I did not expect. There is no simple formula and no one has sold out to "the man." The film is liberating, cathartic. "You are alive after all," says a friend to Juha. So are all who witness and appreciate this little gem. Streaming on Shudder. Four and a half of five stars. -
ommik4 November 2019I kind of wanted to like this movie; it's stylish, brutal and occasionally funny.
However, the story and the characters were very lackluster. Especially the backstory of the drowning wife felt bit lazy for me; why do you need to explain someone's kink with a trauma?
Worth a watch tho, if you're interested in the subject matter. -
oguzyildizrc9 October 2019Movie was around 100 minutes but it felt like 10 min. Director was magnificent, story was great and everything was perfect about this movie.
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rockinkettles-123 September 2020This movie is labeled as drama, romance and dark comedy. Wrong. There was nothing funny about it or romantic. It was sick, twisted, disturbing and depressing. People who gave this a good review must be as sick as this movie is. I recently had a tooth pulled, so one scene in particular really turned me off. I couldn't watch it. The scene went on for too long and was a sick peice of torture. If you're into that, then by all means knock yourself out and watch it. In the movie, a man loses his wife to a drowning accident. He begins seeing a dominatrix to help cope with the trauma he suffers from. He has her smother and choke him. At one point, it goes too far. She doesn't want to see him anymore. He's obsessed with her, so he won't stop going after her to see him again. I almost didn't finish watching this movie. I stuck it out and was glad when it was over. People who call this a masterpiece have got to be kidding. It is far from it. Well. That's my opinion. Either watch at your own risk or just skip it. I wish now that I did skip this one. It is way overrated.
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puffyferts28 January 2021This. Movie. Rocks. I can't stress how amazing this film is. Every frame of it is a dark delight. From script, to actors, to tone, to directing, to set and art design, it's the pinnacle of true (and ENTERTAINING with a capital everything) art. Sometimes people are grief-stricken, and sometimes they become husks of their former selves. It takes an actual slap in the face to awaken our hero from his slumber...and then a bunch more slaps...
This is a story for anyone who has ever wondered what it takes to truly get themselves out of an endless funk. It's a true caterpillar violently transitioning into a butterfly (one albeit bound in leather). I had never seen a Finish movie before but Pekka Strang and (the captivating, devastatingly beautiful) Krista Kosonen both deserve Oscars, and then some.
Look, it may be a bit extreme for some people, but what great art isn't?
"How did you convince them you were sane?" - "...I lied" :))) -
...came back having all my expectations subverted. No, this movie is NOT just about sex or bdsm, it does have a decent story behind it. It's about Juha, dealing with the loss of his wife and getting into the kink world in the process. The story does lack depth and I was a bit disapointed that Mona's story wasn't explored more. I was surprised how visual the movie was and how little dialogue this had, it was a nice touch. And can I say how great the actors were in this? The performances of the two leads were absolutely stellar! Go in with an open mind.
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oonaemiliasaloranta29 November 2020Drugged. Also vivid, but still a bit dull. Wasn't a waste of time, but I expected much more. Pekka Strang works as always! The last scene was the best, but it can't support the entire movie.
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necromancer-mcgill15 April 2021How do you deal with loss?
It's true that many horror films have grief as an underlying theme, this is not a horror film however. There are some cringe inducing moments but it's played in a more comic fashion. Really solid little picture. The nurturing relationship between mistress and dog comes with the same confusions and longings as any other. The relationship with the daughter could perhaps have been explored to more depth but it all works pretty well.
7.5 rounded up. -
paipe-5454016 January 2022Since there aren't so many interesting finnish movies I was rather excitet to see this one. Unfortunately it didn't deliver. It is fsirly obvious somewehere from a good start the movies just losts itself. The main plot and man characters progression is forgotten in bdsm scenes and overall drifting. There isn't enough evidence to build the story believably from start to finnish. One of the worst parts are that they totally forget the relationship with the father and daughter and they don't really build enough tension and sense between the main characters. Also the way the main characters gets into bdsm is rather hard for anybody to believe if they know anything about bdsm at all. Still something you might enjoy if you have nothing more special to watch. I appreciate the effort trying to make something different .