Losers Never Get Laid!!! (2018)

Dick Chibbles wrote and directed this poor attempt at a cornball romantic comedy, which seems stuck in the 1950s, though not a nostalgia or period piece. It bears some cult interest by casting Ron Jeremy in a leading role, playing a fantasy version of himself as an ultimate authority on getting laid, appearing as deus ex machina to tutor our hapless young hero.

The structure is part Cyrano de Bergerac and vintage Woody Allen (his famous play and movie "Play It Again, Sam" with Bogart as fantasy mentor. Connor Kennedy gives flat line readings in the central role, a nebbish whose romantic fortunes take a turn for the better when Ron Jeremy (looking very old and tired) shows up to coach him on pick-up lines with women.

The comedy is unfunny and the sex ho-hum, as Chibbles is clearly not ready for prime time as a director for the long-running Couples Romance label Adam & Eve. Besides the overbearing and over-the-hill presence of Ron Jeremy (best taken in small doses as cameos now that his porn-performing career is over), the casting of affected actor Tommy Pistol as Connor's slacker buddy is ridiculous: flabby Pistol was already in his 40s when unconvincingly cast in this 20-something role.

Definitely not a has-been, Katie Morgan is looking as great as ever, popping up as part of a 3-girl team (with tall-tall Alexa Grace and Miranda Miller) that eventually services Connor in a reverse-gang-bang. Gimmick of Kennedy finally revealing a huge cock for that group-sex finale is a poorly-executed twist, that was far better achieved in a similar but Gay Porn rom-com a decade earlier titled "The Intern", with Ben Andrews.