VideoMonkey

You would think this show was created with us VideoMonkeys in mind. It has Robots, Zombies, and Bad Movies, three of the mainstay ingredients in any VideoMonkey's diet. In fact, I think the only thing missing is gratuitous tits (although some of the bad movies might have a little like the Lady Frankenstein did)...but the riffing (another thing dear to the heart of any VideoMonkey) more than makes up for any lack of nudity. Truly, the riffing is right on par with the likes of MST3k (which the show emulates) or RiffTrax.

If you are a fellow VideoMonkey, or would like to one day be one, this is definitely a show worth checking out. The DVDs are worth of being called DVDs with tons of extra features and be sure and check out the ICWXP YouTube channel for more excellent fun and Resident Evil reviews. The only sucky thing about ICWXP is that there isn't more of it to enjoy...

Seriously. This movie is pretty bad in exactly to the same way 'The Room' was, which in the case of 'The Room' made it entertaining. Of course, could I make it through 'The Room' without the Rifftrax? I doubt it. Did I make it through 'Apartment 1303'? Yes I did, but not without making up some Riffing of my own. Will I watch it again like I have done with 'The Room'? Maybe because I think I might have missed a couple things while we were discussing the plot holes but I'm dubious. Still, this is definite fodder for those of you who like to riff and make fun of movies. I gave it 5 rating because I am one of those people and this movie scores a 10 in that department so I averaged that 10 with what this movie would normally be rated by myself as a serious horror film, and rounded down. You do the math.

..and so did this.

Actually if I wasn't miss-informed by the description, I might have liked it more...or more likely not even watched it.

I was expecting a war-time action adventure brothers-in-arms type thing like PRIVATE RYAN or UNCOMMON VALOR, but instead I got some watered down lovey-dovey PEARL HARBOR type thing.

I guess this would be good for a date movie, I mean my girlfriend now owes me a little something for making me sit through this.

I was ready to fall asleep 30 minutes in, and despite the somewhat accurate, with real footage, informative introduction, the story goes right down the fantasy road after that. I kept thinking, 'please somebody have a fire-fight! Please!' OK maybe it's just me but I watch war movies to see the horrors of war and to see the hero's who rise above and persevere. War movies do NOT need love interests!

I watch a lot of low (next to non-existent) budget independent movies, and although this one might not be the normal exploitative feast I usually gorge my eyes on, I was duly impressed.

In fact, I think it was this total lack of exploitativeness, that grabbed me. That and the excellently well done acting.

OK OK...explain yourself VideoMonkey!

All right, for instance, the girls... they were cute enough I guess and everything, but they looked like real honest to god teenagers, not 20-something silicon breasted porn stars in pigtails. And not a gratuitous shower scene in the whole movie. Nope nothing like that. Instead there is actually a interesting enough story to keep the viewers attention...I liked the story too, although you might want to be (or have been), or at least have, a angst ridden teenager to achieve the full effect. Truly though it didn't turn out the way I predicted and that in itself is a wondrous thing! I was expecting just another Columbine movie but this one is at least two notches above.

And the acting... definitely heads above most indie movies. It's right up there with 42K for sure! Solid performances all around...

This movie is technically well done, especially for a first time film maker... The music is cool..those little foreboding B&W security camera-looking flashes of the future were neat too...

This might not be for everyone's interest but it sure beats the hell out of any After School Special I have ever seen....I bet your teenager will think so too..

First you have to set movies apart in your mind... There is the multi-million dollar studio flick and there is the independent flick. If you can except this, then you can understand my 10 rating. If not, you are saying to me, "Chim, if you give this a 10, what do you give Land of the Dead or the Dawn of the Dead remake?" and I say that's comparing apples and oranges...

If you are into independent flicks, and can accept the limitations that not having million dollar budgets imposes, and can realize compromises must be made when you don't have the funds, then I think you'll be liking this. If not, maybe you'll get tripped up a bit by the flaws, but even still, I bet you'll watch the whole thing.

It's a Zombie Movie right, so think about all the cool stuff you like about Zombie movies...yeap, it's all there. That Dave Francis, the writer/director, really knows his zombie stuff.

Basically the story revolves around a group of survivors after a post-apocalyptic zombie uprising. The twist with these zombies though, is that they only come out at night. They are slow and their bites are infectious, but they are plenty and always hungry for human flesh. And they look really good considering the budget. Still, it's not so much the zombies, but the power struggles between the living and the crumbling of civilization that make the conflict in the story. But like I said, it's a zombie movie, you want gore, not plot...and there is gore aplenty... and you want action, and maybe it's no Wild Zero, but there is enough fighting and gun-play to go around.

The 'exploding leg' alone is worth the price of admission! And yet, there is enough interpersonal relationship stuff to keep the girlfriend interested.

Now I must admit, I helped out on the set of the sequel Zombie Night 2 (not to mention played a half dozen zombies) and worked with Dave Francis personally, and I've seen him in action. And I have the Director's Cut double DVD and watched all the extras (hours worth). And I bear witness to all the love and hard work that went into this film and watching it I bet you will see it too!

I've seen many many movies that some would call BAD. I've seen many others that I myself would call BAD. But this video goes way beyond being just mere BAD. This video is ... well it's hard to find a word for it...awful...horrible...dreadful...they all come close, but just don't quite fit the mark. But maybe, just maybe, the title says it all. GEEK MAGGOT BINGO!!! So I slide this sucker into my VCR and begin to watch. I see the one and only Zacherley hosting this. Now old Zach might be the Cool Ghoul and all, but this was definitely not his finest hour. Then the story begins. Don't ask me to explain it to you but there is a Cowboy and a mad scientist, his daughter and his humpback assistant and a two-headed monster and a hottie vampire and her vampire followers. They they wander around and say a bunch of stuff in some of the most amateurish sets imaginable. The sets make Ed Wood's look like big-budget Hollywood. It looks like it was made in someones basement or garage, like a home movie. Like some guy got a camera and all his friends (or anyone else who was willing to dress up, or get undressed, and act like a retard) and made something up over the weekend and edited it himself (I don't think I've ever seen worse editing). And who was that guy? Why it was Nick Zedd, God bless 'em.

Of note, however, is the fact that, then up and coming, Ed French, did the special effects on this. And, almost in contrast to the terrible sets, he does a couple very cool make-ups including the two headed monster.

Also of note was a certain Bob Martin in the credits. Could this be the same Uncle Bob Martin I remember from the early days of Fangoria magazine. I'll have to dig out my back issues and find out. (*and sure enough it was, thanks for the email Uncle BoB*)

And speaking of Bobs, I saw a few Church of the Subgenius references which could go to explain a lot.

So what's with the title? Is there geeks and do they play Bingo with maggots? I think my girlfriend solved that one for me I think, suggesting it was a take-off of 'Beach Blanket Bingo'. But who knows what goes on in the minds of people who make movies like this. It could be or mean anything. Sort of reminiscent of pre- Pink Flamingoes John Waters, this movie is definitely an endurance challenge to even the most die-hard fan of shlock-camp-B movie videos. A must see!!!

I don't even know where to begin. I'm sure Farrah Fawcett is rolling over in her grave because of this movie, and she is not even dead yet. OK, so the original TV series was kinda hoaky, but what do you expect from '70s TV, but this movie was an insult to my intelligence. Over blown special FX (ripped off from the Matrix), a foolish story, music video style cimematography, all combine for a seriously bad movie. I mean REALLY bad, not even so bad it's funny bad, I mean just plain awefull! You'd have to be very superficial or well programmed by Hollywood to like this movie. I wanted to walkout, but the kids wanted to stay. Kids will watch anything bright and shiny, although when I questioned them about this movie after, they could not even tell me what it was about. About the only fun us adults had watching this was catching all the bloopers and screw ups....... I want my money and two hours of my life back!!!

This is definitely one of my all time favorite movies. At first glance it looks like one of those movies that might appeal to the 'Faces of Death' crowd or porno fetish lovers, it dealing with S&M and bondage and Bob Flanagan nailing his penis to a board and all, but this is actually a powerful moving insight into the life, and death (he does die in the end) of Bob Flanagan, Supermasochist, and one of the longest survivors of cystic fibrosis. The movie delves not only into Bob performance art but also into his personal life, and an interesting life indeed.

This movie is definately not for the squeemish, and does deliver some very bizzarre stuff, and yes it graphically up close shows the nailing th penis in the board. But it's so much more than that. Bob Flanagan was definitely one of the most interesting individuals I can think of, and this movie, I think captures that quality perfectly!

Check it out, if you can find it.

Fully cool faithful adaptation to the original Lovecraft story. Not like most most Lovecraft adaptations,like Brian Yuzna's which are fully cool but not quite faithful. This one is down the line true as an adaptation can get... A must see for Lovecraft fans!!!!!!!

Now don't get me wrong, this film is not really that bad. Kevin Lindenmuth is an awesome film maker and can do more with small budget than almost anybody I can think of. But I think full body werewolves, I think, was just a little bit out of his depth.

The movie itself is a sci-fi horror that happens in the near future after a meteor on a collision course with the earth is deflected by nuclear weapons into the moon. This adjusts the moons orbit and causes many otherwise normal humans who happen to have a certain gene, turn into werewolves when the moon is full. Bounty hunters are out hunting the werewolves, but as if this isn't enough, the hero of our story is a traditional cursed werewolf, and can change at will. He and his brother, who is also cursed as a werewolf, had their family burned alive because of their curse and, although our hero has come to terms and just wants to be left alone, his brother plots to wipe out the humans. To this effect, he captures a vampire (yeap, there are werewolves so the is also vampires, and mutants too) and experiments mixing vampire and werewolf blood.

The story itself is not too bad and the acting is adequate, but where this movie falls down is the cheese. Obviously, cheese is common place in these sorts of movies because of budget limitations, but otherwise good film making, as in many other of Lindenmuth's flicks, gets you past it. But in this one, the cheesy werewolf costumes made me laugh out loud, which was clearly not what they were supposed to do. The heads looked like halloween masks and the bodies were clearly gorilla suits, and what was up with those ears??? I kept thinking of the time my buddies had a stag party for me and the stripper came out in a cookie monster costume. She looked so cuddly, just like these werewolves. The explosions and other such visual-type effects looked cheesy too, like old Saturday morning cartoons. It detracted from the mood intended. I think they should have stuck with make-up werewolves, the pre-werewolf changing make-ups looked good, but when they were fully changed, forget about it. Even the Lon Chaney as the wolfman looked more realistic.

On the plus side though, the Vampire looked good, as played by Debbie Rochon, so how could she not. Even with no nudity or without kissing other girls, Debbie Rochon puts on a sexy performance and makes for one hot vampire.

The title might throw some of the World of Darkness RPGers off. This movie, although ripe with many of the same elements has nothing to do with the White Wolf game universe (even though they have a CCG with werewolves called 'Rage'). Over all though, it's worth a watch. If you can get past the werewolf costumes, you might like it, and if not, they are good for a laugh!!!

I saw this flick years ago when TV was still cool and they had late night movies on most stations instead of ridiculous talk-shows and infomercials. It was probably only on because it was Canadian, and stations were required to have so much Canadian content and back them Canadian movies were for the most part bad or non-existent. It had all the cursing blanked out but still I was old enough to infer what was said. But I was most impressed with this back then! It took me a lot of years to track down a copy of this on video, and now that I did and watched it again, I still thought that it was awesomely cool (even though I knew what the ending would be). The story is pretty simple. A group of hunters bored because there is nothing left to shoot, meet another group of hunters in the same situation. Then just like that, a firefight erupts leaving one of their group injured and one of the other group dead. From then on, it builds up from 'should they report it' to 'they be after us for revenge' and every level in between. So the hunters get all the guns and gear and able-bodied men they can and go back to the spot the following Saturday in anticipation of the other hunters being there to ambush them. Will they be there or is it just paranoia? I'm not saying but the ending is a surprise.

This is so far from the mainstream that I can understand that not many people will like it. I,however, like this sort of flick. And as far, as no-budget indie horror flicks go, Tim Ritter is THE MAN. And this is definitely, my favorite of his movies. If you did not like this you will definitely hate his other movies, but if you saw 'Truth or Dare' or one of his other movies and thought it was cool then check this one for sure. It's got great gore effects, a rather cool plot twist and, like most of Ritter's flicks, as the goriness surmounts, the plot thins in almost a surreal manner which still today has me wondering if it was meant to or it just turns out that way....

This movie pulls no punches and makes no pretensions. It sets out from the beginning to do a job, and it not only does it, it overkills it. The job you might ask? Why to rip-off every post-apocalyptic, after the bomb, flick that has come before it. Mad Max/Road Warrior, ripped off, Escape From New York, ripped off large, anything that is remotely cool from almost any flick of this genre previous, is exploited. Hell, they even have some Planet of the Apes in there too... Now don't get me wrong. This is not necessarily a bad thing. It's pretty well done 'in that over the top Italian Cinema way'. When I first saw this thing when I was about 15, I ate it right up and it was one of the first 10 videos I owned in my life. And by the time I was done college the tape was worn out. And years and years later when I saw it in a cheap previously viewed video bin for $4, I picked it up again and it was worth every penny.

I never understood a word in this flick. But that didn't stop me from watching it again and again. With a gory bloody mutilated body count of 117, every gore fan should be utterly enthralled! Unbelievable, puts Peter Jackson and even Andreas Schnass to shame for sure quantity and quality of gore. And even though I speak no German and there is a lot of flashbacks and a few talky parts, I think I followed the story pretty good. Makes a good gory watch!!!

Thank God for the Internet Movie Database!!! When I first got this movie I watched it every night just before before bed and was getting something different out of it every time. But no matter how I sliced it, it came up disturbing. The black and white and all the twitching really freaked me. You stare at the screen unsure of what you are looking at, and just when you think you got it, it becomes clear and it's something completely different. The imagery is VERY disturbing, twitching and straight razors do not sit well with me in any movie. Still everytime I watched it, I was interpreting it somewhat differently (there is no dialogue, ya know), so I decided to check the IMdB for the plot summary. Boy that throws me for a loop, I had no idea that was supposed to be God. Now I'm going to watch it with this in mind and see what happens....

The suave daring super thief was epitomized in MARIO BAVA's classic DANGER DIABOLIK, but DIABOLIK definitely borrowed big time from this flick...

MISTER X, a mysterious thief and master of disguise and his ever lovely cohort, who steal more for the thrill than the having, are brought out of retirement to clear MISTER X's name. A evil crime lord has killed his girlfriend (who knew too much) and has pinned the rap on MISTER X. MISTER X becomes AVENGER X as he takes on the crime syndicate.

Sure this didn't have the budget of DIABOLIK but it has lots of that '60s James Bond type super-spy type action. AVENGER X takes on various disguises, uses all sorts of nifty gadgets and there are plenty of fights and gunplay and danger and seduction as both the criminals and the cops get him in the squeeze play.

Definitely a flick ahead of it's day....

I was 11 years old when I first saw this and I seem to recall liking it. What goes on in the head of an 11 year old anyway. I seemed to remember some dumb musical numbers it could have done without, but having a fully cool animated cartoon segment, but I wondered the next Christmas why it wasn't shown again like other holiday specials were. Then recently I obtained a video copy of it, and now I know why it was never shown again. This is so bad, obvious made for TV quality featuring the STAR WARS cast is interspersed with dubbed over clips from the movie. Cheesy musical numbers, including one by Jefferson Starship are added for some reason, stretch the time out I guess in this really lame story of the Chewbackas family awaiting his return for Life Day, some sort of universal holiday in the Star Wars Galaxy (how a day can be the same on every planet is only one of the plots thin points). Chewies son, a little wookie brat, is a prequel to the Ewoks and his father is a wookie perv who checks out Homo Sapian chicks in this virtual-reality cyber sex thing (way before its time).

All in all, this just drips of cheese, but I still kinda liked the animated segment...reminded me of the later Droids cartoon...

This movie should be seen by everyone. It should be manditory viewing in high school like THE OUTSIDERS and RUMBLE FISH were. It could really change your life. Solid performances and excellent filmatography will hold the interest of even the most superficial automaton our society can produce. But this film has a message and if you get it, you know its true ands it will stick with you.

So you can't make up your sleazy little mind which you should watch, a XXX perverted sex flick or Cheesy Blood Drenched Gore Feast. Well here it is, the solution. This flick has lots sex action mixed with gore decapitations, bloody throat cuttings and even a penis amputation (ouch!!!!). The plot (and of course I use that term loosely)revolves around this Nymphomaniac/Masochist woman who is committed to an asylum. Said asylum, of course, has a new lesbian nurse every night, who ends up slaughtered and is run by a coven of demonic Satanists.

And what might you ask, does this movie have that no other does?? Why a haunted severed talking penis, of course!!!!

A Internet pal of mine sent me this little gem and said , "check this out 'cause it's brutally gory and right up your alley." Now don't get me wrong, I'm not a full time gorehound, but sometimes I like a good exploitative gory bloodfest movie, where plot and stuff are secondary and in-your-face shock-value gore reigns supreme. So I tossed an eye at it, and sure enough, it delivered the goods. And not only that, it delivered them with some excellent heavy music. Very well done for independent non-existent budget film-makers!!! Still, I'm not gonna let my girlfriend touch it. Even though her favorite movies are ENTRAILS of the VIRGIN and EBOLA SYNDROME, she would surely loose it with the fetus scene... So be warned!!!

Shot on video, this mystery serial killer would seem pretty typical of the '80s slasher genre, except for the cheap sets and the horrendous acting and bad writing. And I do mean seriously bad, but strangely enough that's what adds the charm to this little ditty. And, of course, its got sex and nudity and graphic bloody killings and even an attempt at a twist ending,(like anybody cares who the killer is)....

H. G. Lewis, the Grandfather of Gore, has always been a fav of mine. Ok, maybe his movies pale compared to the gory realism of today, but Gore flicks had to start somewhere. And this one, has got to be my favorite. Kind of a cool story and the bad acting and cheesy gore, and the just plain silly red-necks just contribute to make this just one entertaining movie. Ok.. so maybe those Yankees didn't have it coming, but boy those Rebel rednecks sure know how to have fun... anybody wanna go out for a good old fashioned barrel-roll???

I think I was about 6 when I first saw this. And being 6 this movie just blew me away. It was the perfect combination of thrills and chills and fun and mystery. I saw it few times growing up...even going so far as to stay up til 2am on a school night when I was about 12. Then one day, all grown up (well as much as I'll ever be), I saw this on Video and so I bought it right there and took it home for the kid. And sure enough it stood the test of time, and was watched constantly for about three weeks. She said it was Scooby-Doo, only not a cartoon and without the Scooby gang. When the Great William Castle made his movies with the gimmicks, I don't think he needed one for this movie, but I'd give a body part to see it with the Ghost-Viewer; but then again who in the audience would really watched the movie without looking at the ghosts anyway?!?!

OK... So your gonna make a Zombie Flick... Well first you need Zombie music to set the mood, get Goblin from Dawn of the Dead. In fact, use the same music. And while we are ripping of Dawn of the Dead, let's have a SWAT team.

Now.. set it in a remote location with some natives like Fulci's ZOMBIE

OK... so CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST is a pretty famous flick and Cannibals and Zombies both eat people, so let's get some Cannibal Footage to through in and some pretty wild life stuff too... we can rip that off of that Shockumentary 'Death Faces' which features all the New Guinea cannibal tribes.

Now we have to stir in a large amount of gratuitous gore and go heavy on the eye violence...

Now sprinkle lightly with nudity...

And there ya have it...one gory zombie epic sure to please any die hard zombie gore fan. (but probably no one else will like it)

This expliotative documentary is certainly dated, and feeds to the believe that witches and satanists are pretty much the same thing, which I know will irritate and offend all the pagans out there. It even has Anton LeVey and has some footage of his rituals and stuff. There is lots of nudity at black masses, but it stops short of showing anything to sexual. Good for a watch, if even only for the Hippie campfire cult footage...